Here’s How You Know You’re In A Stable Relationship

You might be in love, but love will only get you so far — what you really need is stability. Do you have a strong foundation for your relationship to stand on? Have you planted roots that can grow into a healthy, long-lasting love? Here’s how you know if you and your partner are on the right track:

  1. You don’t wonder if he really loves you. When he tells you he loves you, you don’t wonder if that’s really the truth. Even if he didn’t say it, he shows it every day. You don’t doubt the fact that he cares. In fact, when the whole day has been terrible, he’s the one person you can always count on to make things better because no matter what, you know you’ll always have his love.
  2. You’re not constantly worried about the end. You’re not afraid that every fight might be your last. You don’t worry that if you upset him, a breakup is right around the corner. In fact, as of right now, you don’t see any sort of end to the relationship. You’re both in this for the long haul and that’s why you’re not constantly worried about the end of your fairytale. Instead, you’re planning on living happily ever after.
  3. You’re not afraid to pick a fight. You know that he’ll still love you even when you disagree. Even stable relationships aren’t perfect. You’re not going to have the same opinions on every subject under the sun. Sometimes you’ll agree and sometimes you’ll disagree, but you’ll never be afraid to have different viewpoints. Every time you fight, you know you’ll make up because, at the end of the day, you won’t let anything tear your love apart.
  4. You’ve never broken up. Breaking up and getting back together is one of the clearest signs of instability. You couldn’t cut it so you called it quits. Instead of fighting for your relationship, you did the easy thing and just gave up. Eventually, when the anger of whatever fight triggered your breakup blew over, you decided to get back together. Those problems didn’t disappear, though — they’re just waiting to come back up to the surface and you’ll be left parting ways once again. That’s anything but stability. If you’ve weathered your storms as a pair, you’re on the right track.
  5. You know how to communicate with each other. You don’t have to fight and scream just to get your point across. You know how to talk to one another and make sure you’re both on the same page. You’re in sync with each other, there’s a comforting rhythm to your relationship. It’s as if you’re on the same wavelength, because you know that if you can’t communicate properly with one another, then your entire relationship is doomed.
  6. You don’t have to snoop through his things. You don’t go behind his back searching for some sort of betrayal. He’s entitled to a private life, and that’s why you don’t go looking through his phone, emails, web history, or anything else. If you’re worried about something, all you have to do is ask. You don’t snoop because you know your faithful guy has nothing to hide.
  7. When there’s a problem, you solve it. You don’t just ignore the issues in your relationship — you face them head on. You know that no relationship is perfect, and that’s why you don’t let the imperfections make you think you’re wrong for each other. Every couple has their problems, but the ones in stable relationships know that fighting for solutions is the only way that relationship will survive.
  8. You trust him completely. You know he’d never hurt you because you actually trust him. You’re not worried about where he’s going, what he’s doing, or who he’s with. When he tells you something, you trust that he’s telling the truth. You don’t have to check up on him because at the end of the day, he’s never given you a reason for doubt.
  9. You can say how you really feel. Being honest with your partner isn’t a problem in your relationship. You can tell him when you’re hurt, angry, and incredibly happy. No matter what emotion you feel, you know that when you express it, he’ll actually care. The stability in your relationship allows you to wear your heart on your sleeve without the fear of rejection.
  10. You don’t question your love for him. You’re not in a constant state of worry about whether or not the relationship is right. You don’t wonder if you simply love him or you’re actually in love with him. Each day you wake up knowing he’s the only person you want to be with. You love him completely, and no part of your heart questions that.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.