He’s Ignoring My Texts: Why He Hasn’t Replied And What To Do About It

Being left on read is one of the most frustrating parts of modern dating. Whether you just started seeing someone or have made it official, it’s never a good feeling to know that a guy or girl is ignoring your texts. Luckily, there are a bunch of reasons why someone might not reply, so you don’t have to panic just yet. It doesn’t automatically mean they don’t like you (although it can mean that). Here are the most common reasons why he’s not replying.

  1. He genuinely forgot. Sometimes, the reason that a guy hasn’t responded to your text is that he legitimately forgot. Although a guy who really likes you won’t always forget to reply to you, it can happen. Life gets busy. This doesn’t necessarily mean that he doesn’t like you. If he genuinely forgot, he’ll likely be apologetic when he remembers and try not to do it again.
  2. He can’t text right now. It’s possible that he’s not purposely ignoring your texts—maybe he’s just too busy. There are a lot of things that can keep a guy from responding to a text message. He could be at work or studying. Maybe he’s with family or friends and wants to be present. Or he could be at the gym, grocery shopping, or any other number of places. Maybe he’s even immersed in his favorite Netflix show!
  3. He’s playing hard to get. Early on in a relationship, one person might try to play hard to get. In order words, they’ll see how hard they can make the other person work for their affection. It’s possible that he’s ignoring your texts on purpose because he’s playing hard to get. But this can’t last forever. And past a certain point, it moves from playing hard to get to being disrespectful.
  4. He doesn’t like you. According to Elite Daily, one of the reasons why he might ignore your texts is simply because he’s not into you. As hard as it is to hear, this could be his way of sending the message that he’s not interested. Not everyone has the courage to tell someone that they don’t like them like that. Many people will ghost or ignore, hoping that the other person gets it sooner or later.
  5. He feels overwhelmed. You might be the reason that he’s not replying, but it doesn’t necessarily have to mean that he doesn’t like you. It could be that he really likes you but he feels overwhelmed. Maybe this is his first relationship. Or it could be moving too fast. He does like you but he just wants to slow things down a little so he doesn’t feel completely consumed.
  6. He’s angry with you. We’ve all been there. A common reason for not replying is being angry. If you’ve done something to upset him, he may be letting you know how he feels by giving you the cold shoulder. Usually when this is the case, he will reply when he’s cooled down. Otherwise, you might have to ask him if he’s angry with you and give him a chance to vent his feelings.
  7. He needs space. Style Craze points out that sometimes a guy doesn’t reply because he just needs space. Maybe he likes you and you’ve done nothing wrong, but he just needs some time to himself. It’s possible that he has a lot going on with work, family, study, or any of the other areas in his life. He could just need a break and can’t wrap his head around crafting a text right now.
  8. He hates texting. Not everyone is a wordsmith. A common reason for people not responding to texts is a dislike towards it. It’s possible that he feels he can’t articulate himself properly over text, or that his message gets lost. Maybe he just can’t be bothered and prefers a quick phone call. If it’s a common occurrence that he ignores your texts, find out if a phone call works better.
  9. Don’t send multiple texts. As hard as it is to resist, try not to send multiple texts. This will make you appear needy and, if he’s overwhelmed or needs space, will put him off further. You can send one follow-up message but then try to sit back and give it some time. After multiple days without a reply, the most logical assumption to make is that he’s not into you.
  10. Do check up on him. Don’t send multiple messages, but do check up on him with one follow-up message or a phone call. A phone call may be best if you know he’s not a good texter. Again, you don’t have to call him a million times so you fill up his call log. Just one call to let him know that you’re thinking about him can remind him to respond to you.
  11. Don’t jump to conclusions. Try not to jump to conclusions. It’s possible that he’s not replying because he doesn’t like you, but that’s not the only possible reason. Look at any other clues you have to help you work out what the most likely answer is. Do you know for a fact that he’s applying for a new job? Or that he’s been feeling stressed lately? These may point to other, legitimate reasons for why he’s not texting that aren’t the end of the world. Just try to stay calm and don’t make assumptions until you have a solid reason to do so.
Vanessa Locampo is an Aussie writer who’s equally obsessed with YA fiction and pasta. Her time is divided between writing all the things, reading all the things, listening to Queen, and bopping her cat on the nose. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing and has written for sites including Hotsprings.co and Discovering Montana, and currently works as an editor at Glam. You can keep up with her on Instagram @vanessaellewrites.
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