If He’s Intimidated By These 11 Things About You, He Doesn’t Deserve You

Guys are such an enigma. On one hand, they go around saying how they want a smart, driven girl who takes care of herself. Once they find her, they often freak out and run away. It’s frustrating but definitely not your fault or your problem. If he’s intimidated by these 11 things about you, he doesn’t deserve you.

  1. You’re physically strong and love working out. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to take care of your body. I once dated a guy who couldn’t fathom how I went running seven days a week. To me, it was the most natural thing to get my blood flowing in the morning. If he can’t handle that you exercise and are strict about self-care, he doesn’t deserve you.
  2. You’re ambitious as hell with some serious goals and achievements. It’s no secret that there are dudes out there who feel intimidated by powerful and ambitious women. The truth is that we live in a world of founders and owners, not employees. If you want to start your own business and work 16 hours a day, that’s totally fine. In fact, that’s awesome. If your desire for success intimidates him, you have to find another guy, not another job.
  3. You make more money than he does. It’s not the 1950s anymore. Women have the freedom to pursue goals as high as men do. Being a #gilrlboss will do wonders for you. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to make lots of money and being good at it. If that intimidates him, he can either work harder or find someone who won’t mind being dragged down by a loser. Remember, girls who are intimidating are definitely worth dating.
  4. You’re blunt, straightforward, and honest to a fault. Playing mind games is a huge waste of time. Unfortunately, some people are immature and think that playing them is the way to keep someone’s interest. Being honest about your feelings and thoughts makes you brave and amazing. If he can’t handle hearing what’s actually on your mind, he doesn’t deserve you.
  5. Other guys want you—and why wouldn’t they? You’re a catch, so it’s only normal that there are dudes running after you. It takes a mature man to realize that good things in life attract attention. He should only be happy that he’s somehow managed to lock you down. If he gets overly jealous and throws tantrums about it, he doesn’t deserve you. He probably doesn’t understand you either.
  6. You’re intelligent and inquisitive about the world around you. If you’re a bookworm reading 500 pages a day or like to go to conferences and libraries, do you. Don’t dumb yourself down to please a guy who doesn’t have intellectual interests. This is not calculus class and you’re not Cady Heron. You should be with a man who stimulates your intellectual growth, not someone who drags you down.
  7. You’re a natural risk-taker. There are two types of people in the world—those who wish for things and those who go out and get it done. Risks are scary, but that doesn’t intimidate you. You’re ready to start a business or hop on a plane to Thailand at the drop of a hat because you know you have to take some chances if you want to reap the rewards. You need more than a boyfriend—you need a partner who will support you.
  8. All of your close friends are dudes. If all of your close friends are guys, that’s fine. It doesn’t mean you’re going to hook up with all of them. Your significant other should be able to accept and handle your crew regardless of gender. If the men in your life intimidate him, he doesn’t deserve you and he needs to work on his self-esteem.
  9. You’re allergic to laziness and are always on the go. Some guys like to sit around and do nothing. If laziness isn’t your thing, that’s totally fine. In fact, being on the go and constantly doing things is great. As physics teaches us, “A body in motion will stay in motion.” Don’t be afraid to use your energy productively. Go on a trip. Go hiking. Throw a party. If your energy intimidates him, move on to someone who can handle it.
  10. You’re an adrenaline junkie. Why do we live if not for adventure? If you like to bungee jump, climb steep hills or explore caves, you’re a rockstar. Don’t pretend to be weaker than you are just so a guy won’t be intimidated by you. Find a man who would love to go on these crazy adventures with you instead.
Dayana is a passionate traveler who's been navigating foreign lands and confusing relationships since she was 16. You can read more of her work on Matador Network and her blog, Dee Across The Sea.