Signs He’s Into You But Scared To Make A Move

It’s nice when a cute guy makes the first move but it doesn’t happen all the time. Some guys can be a bit timid—after all, they’re as scared of rejection as women are. If you’re wondering if he likes you, here are a few obvious signs to look for so that you’ll have the confidence to ask him out yourself.

  1. He texts you out of nowhere. He asks how you’re doing and wants to chat with you. He might not even have anything to say. In sending you a “hey, what’s new” text, he’s more or less telling you that you’re on his mind. Guys don’t bother sending extra messages to women they’re simply not into, so if he’s blowing up your phone, consider that to be a great sign.
  2. He acts on conversations you’ve had. If you’ve told him that blue is your favorite color and he happens to be wearing blue the next time you see him, that’s not a coincidence. If he’s actually following through with the conversations you’ve had, that means he’s been paying attention (and possibly writing this stuff down in order to remember it correctly).
  3. So far, a lot of your time together has been spent in a group. Even if the two of you are doing all the talking, there are other people around. That’s probably because he’s afraid of asking you out one-on-one. The group is there as a buffer to make the whole thing seem more casual.
  4. He’s built a few inside jokes with you. Inside jokes happen between two people who are both close and on the same page. It could have been something you witnessed together, or perhaps something funny you both can’t get over. Regardless of how it happened, he still likes bringing them up. It’s a way to remind you that you shared a fun moment together.
  5. Mutual friends can’t help but ask you what you think of him. Either they’ve seen the sparks themselves or your boyfriend-to-be called in a favor to get a good idea of whether or not you’d consider dating him. When other people get involved, it’s obvious that there’s a crush lingering. It may seem a little like how you managed relationships in high school, but it worked then, so why not now?
  6. His compliments come across as being nervous. He’ll tell you he likes your shirt or the way you styled your hair but it’s sorta muttered under his breath. That’s because he wants you to know he’s noticing these things but it’s still somewhat scary for him to build up the confidence. If this guy doesn’t have a lot of dating experience, or perhaps just got out of a long relationship, this may be more common.
  7. He’s asked you a few times if you’re seeing anyone. He knows he should make a move by now but is still a bit afraid. By checking to make sure another guy hasn’t swooped you up, he’s seeing if he still has time by his side. If this guy wasn’t into you as more than just a friend, he wouldn’t even bother. If you like him, take this as a clue that you should just ask him out yourself.
  8. People have told you before that you’re “intimidating.” Listen, take this as a compliment. That means that you have your act together and that guys feel like they might not be worthy enough to date you. Basically, he just assumes you wouldn’t be into him. In his eyes, he feels like you could date whoever you want. It’s annoying to have this label in the dating world, but if you do, you’re probably used to taking matters into your own hands.
  9. He might model himself off the guys he’s seen you date before. Everyone has a type, and for some, that type varies. If you’ve known this guy for some time and he’s seen what the other guys you date look like, you may notice a subtle change in him. Maybe he’s rocking a beard since he knows your ex had one during your relationship. Or, maybe he’s experimenting with the kind of clothes he wears. If he looks incredibly different than what he knows “your type” to be, it’s possible that’s part of the reason why he hasn’t asked you out by now.
Karen Belz is a New Jersey native who is currently living in Maryland. She has a Bachelor’s Degree in Speech Communication with a focus in Broadcasting and Print Media Studies from Millersville University of Pennsylvania. Since graduating, she has written for sites like LittleThings, HelloGiggles, and Scary Mommy and is currently an e-commerce editor at Bustle.

When she's not writing, she enjoys making her phone run out of memory after taking too many photos of her dog. You can find her on Twitter @karenebelz or on Instagram @karenbelz.