While no one wants to get stuck in a toxic relationship, being in a lukewarm one that doesn’t serve you and help you to become the best version of yourself isn’t much better. If you’ve found someone you connect with and feel like you could be with for the long haul, here’s how to build a healthy relationship that’s totally unbreakable.
- Support and respect each other’s ambitions and goals. It’s one thing to accept what your partner wants to do, but it’s another thing altogether to be actively supportive and respective of their goals and ambitions. Sure, you both want different things in life, but this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t care about each other’s futures for the time you’re together as a couple. In a healthy relationship, couples will help each other achieve their goals and cheer them on as they do it.
- Argue productively as a way to express yourselves. Productive arguments are a valuable part of a healthy relationship because it shows that you’re not afraid to express yourself. In fact, couples who argue often are better at communicating their problems and are less likely to break up when things go south. Soulmate or not, two people can never agree with each other all the time and it’s better to express yourselves than blocking each other out with passive aggression.
- Give and respect each other’s personal space. Being in a relationship doesn’t mean that you and your partner be joined at the hip. Not only is that unhealthy but it can destroy your ability to be self-sufficient and erode your self-confidence. Give and respect each other’s personal space and do it happily. If you can’t bear to be away from your partner for even a few hours, you might write this off as a sign of deep love, but if you look closely, it’s because of an underlying issue you’re running away from. Having your own life as you build one together with your partner is so important.
- You trust each other. To establish a healthy bond with your partner, you’ll need to dive deep into their heart and mind, but you can’t do this if you don’t trust each other. Trust allows you to get comfortable and helps you visualize a probable future with your partner. It also allows you to settle into the relationship with a sense of ease and confront any issues calmly because you know they have your best interest at heart.
- Respect each other’s boundaries. You may have established a few boundaries as a couple, but you should have and enforce some personal boundaries too. There should be some things you’re uncomfortable with and will not tolerate regardless of the situation, the person doing it, etc. When you express and enforce your limitations, you’re indirectly telling your partner that you won’t tolerate any BS and that you have your own set of beliefs, values, and limits no one’s allowed to mess with.
- Have each other’s backs, no matter what. As long as you’re a couple, you need to be able to blindly trust that they’ll have your back as much as they have yours. Couples in healthy relationships will never tolerate people disrespecting their partners because, for them, this is a total no-go.
- Spend time together doing nothing special. It’s easy to just go out with your partner, have a good time, return home, and call it a day, but can you both have a good time wherever you are as long as you’re together? When you go out, the environment plays a significant role in keeping you happy, but what if you’re locked in a room together? If the answer to that question is a resounding yes, you’re in a healthy relationship! Whether you’re out dining in a restaurant or having a simple meal at home, you prefer to be in each other’s company because, to you, that’s all that matters.
- Laugh with your partner, not at them. There’s a difference between laughing with each other and making snide “jokes” at your partner’s expense. When you’re laughing with each other, you know it’s coming from a good place and you’re both on the receiving end equally. When you’re joking at your partner’s expense, it’s like you’re ridiculing them. Every time you make your partner the butt of a joke, you’re chipping away at their self-esteem. That’s not what you do to someone you care about.
- Don’t take each other for granted. It’s a bitter fact that couples in long-term relationships are most likely to take their partners for granted. Instead of expressing gratitude for the small things they do for us to make our lives easier, we come to expect it and fail to appreciate it. If you want to build a healthy relationship, start by saying “thank you” to the things your partner does out of love and compassion. Don’t just assume that they’ll continue to do what they’re doing because you may end up losing them.