How Dating Is Different When You’re An Old Soul

If you consider yourself an old soul, dating and relationships are likely a bit different for you than they are for others. It’s not necessarily a good or bad thing — it just varies a bit from how many other people experience love. If you’re older on the inside than you are on the outside, you’ve probably experienced these things in your dating life:

  1. You don’t have a lot to add when your friends start trash talking their partners. As an old soul, you tend to err on the side of positivity, meaning pettiness and trash talking aren’t really things that resonates with you. Your girlfriends seem to always be complaining about their latest fling and what a mess their love life is, and you can only smile and nod.
  2. You don’t play games and don’t understand people who do. You have no problem being upfront and honest with the person you love and don’t understand when people play games to protect their egos. Your relationships aren’t ever that dramatic because you don’t mess around or say things behind your partner’s back. With you, what you see is what you get.
  3. You get over breakups a little too quickly When faced with a breakup, you go through all of the usual emotions: sadness, hurt, loneliness, grief, anger. However, you seem to get over it surprisingly fast. It could be because you believe that everything happens for a reason, or maybe it’s your unique ability to see things from a higher perspective.
  4. You avoid fighting with your partner. The act of fighting is like hell on earth for you. Not only is it a waste of time, but it doesn’t feel good. As an old soul, arguments or any sort of conflict feel horrible — it almost makes you sick. You prefer to solve problems in a calm and logical manner without hurting anyone’s feelings. It’s really not that hard to do.
  5. You come across as being trustworthy. All of your past partners have probably said to you, “Wow, I’ve never told anyone that before.” People feel like they can tell you anything. You just have that loving presence about you that makes people want to open up to you regardless of how long you’ve been together.
  6. You see relationships as an opportunity to grow. For you, relationships are like school. You see them as a way to discover things about yourself and humanity at large. This is why it’s so easy for you to let people go. You kind of have this feeling that there’s nothing left to learn from each other, so you have no problem saying goodbye.
  7. You can easily see the big picture. Arguments in relationships are very uncommon for you because of how you see problems. You understand that in the grand scheme of things, just because your boyfriend mixed your whites with your colors doesn’t mean the world is going to end. You believe that everything happens for a reason and are able to brush things off without things escalating.
  8. You don’t date for the sake of it. You’d rather be alone than be with someone who you don’t really like. While your friends are going on lousy date after lousy date, you’re holding out for a deep love. It’s the only kind of relationship that feels worthwhile to you.
  9. You’re able to separate love from sex. As someone who’s more mature in love than others, you are able to see sex with a stranger for what it is: casual sex. You don’t let your emotions get tied up in a one-night stand and don’t really get it when your friends become overly invested in their hookup buddies.
  10. You tend to always be in a long-term, committed relationship. In your opinion, the best kind of relationship is a long-term one, where both people know each other inside out. You live for that deep connection you can only get from a partner when you’ve been with them long-term. Once you’ve found true love, you never let it go.
Jennifer is a playwright, dancer, and theatre nerd living in the big city of Toronto, Canada. She studied Creative Writing at Concordia University and works as a lifestyle writer who focuses on Health, B2B, Tech, Psychology, Science, Food Trends and Millennial Life. She's also a coreographer, playwright, and lyricist, with choreography credits for McMaster University’s “Spring Awakening,” “Roxanne” for the Guelph Contemporary Dance Festival, and “The Beaver Den” for The LOT, among others.

You can see more of her work on her Contently page and follow her on Instagram @jenniferenchin.