How To Deal When Someone Flirts With Your Partner

You’re happily enjoying a night out with your other half when all of a sudden, someone comes along who’s a little too friendly with them. Whether they’ve had too much to drink and are unaware of what they’re doing or they’re purposely stepping on your toes, it’s just not okay. Before you lose your cool, here are some tips on how to cope when someone flirts with your partner.

  1. Remember who your partner is with. It’s important to remember that your partner is in a relationship with you. The chances of them dumping you before the night is through to head off with some random stranger at the bar or a colleague at work are slim to none. Plus, if that actually did happen, they’re clearly not the right person for you and they’re a total jerk. Your partner is with you, so just become someone flirts with them, it doesn’t mean, well, anything at all.
  2. Trust your partner. It takes two to tango, after all, so nothing is going to happen between this person and your partner unless your partner lets it or initiates it. Trust them to shut things down when they get out of hand and to move away from the flirter when they begin feeling uncomfortable or it becomes disrespectful towards you. They’ll handle it.
  3. If appropriate, have a conversation with the flirter. If the person flirting with your partner is someone you know, you should absolutely have an honest conversation with them about how their behavior is making you feel. It’s possible that they may not even be aware of what they’re doing and they’ll be mortified to know you thought there was anything untoward going on. Either way, it’s worth speaking up.
  4. Remind yourself of your worth. Half the reason it bothers us so much when someone flirts with our partner is that we suddenly forget our worth. We forget that we’re strong, intelligent, funny, badass women who are total catches for our partners. Screw that noise. When you start to get in your feelings about some random person giggling a little too much at something your partner says or complimenting them on something, remind yourself of who the hell you are.
  5. Chill out a bit. While it’s annoying when someone’s being flirty with your partner, it’s not the end of the world. Plus, everyone’s definition of flirting is different. If you take laughing at their jokes or bonding over the new Matrix film to be flirting, you need to relax. Unless this other person is forcing themself on your partner or suggesting they get a hotel room for some privacy or something, it’s probably pretty harmless and you’re stressing over nothing.


Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia