How Long Should A First Date Last? Here’s When To Take Your Leave

There are lots of things that determine how successful a first date is, but the main criteria to consider is timing. Yes, the connection is important, but the length of time you spend with a person is a great indicator of how comfortable you feel in their presence. You can’t fake that. And, beyond that, there are other things to think about like your gut feeling about a place but don’t get hung up on the details. Focus on what’s important to you and establish what you value. But, there are some ways of defining how long a first date I’ll get into later on. It’s also key to note that the personnel involved determines how impressive or otherwise the length of a first date is. Read on for more about the age-old question of how long a first date should last.

1. How long is a piece of string? Any question regarding romance or relationships will have a similar answer. It’s really hard to judge in objective terms such a subjective encounter. But only you can know what the relative significance is of something compared with your own experiences. That means you shouldn’t put too much pressure on trying to define your feelings and thoughts too early on in the process. First of all, think about what you’re prepared for. Have you just been at work all day? Has it been a hectic week? Are you ready to give this the time you need to dedicate to it to make it work? If the answer to any of these is negative, then don’t waste either of your time. How long should a date be if you’re uninterested? It shouldn’t happen. There’s your answer.
2. If it’s your first date… Two hours is a good average to aspire to. Sometimes the early stages are the hardest stages. Thinking about places to take the conversation to, finding ways of redirecting the small talk. There isn’t necessarily a natural flow to things yet. You don’t know what each other’s roles are. Or how much you need to pick up the emotional slack. Either way, a first date should aim for the two-hour mark. That means you’re both interested in each other. Or at least, too polite to leave. Also, if the second date feels like a threat rather than a promise, that’s a good enough reason to stop the date there and then.
3. If you’re a queer woman… The average first date is probably around 4 days. Consecutively. Lesbians are absolutely notorious for U-Hauling extremely quickly. Fast-tracking the relationship in two seconds flat. It happens. Roll with it. Don’t be surprised if you’re still on your third date and the queer couple next door to you are looking for surrogates.
4. If you’re a gay man… Ten minutes to confirm the identity of the person opposite you. The rest is history.
5. If you don’t like them.. 30 minutes to set the table and have the appetizer and listen to them regale you with three racist and condescending stories. 12 minutes to sneak out of the bathroom and send your regards via the nearest waitress you find on your way out. No answer is an answer in itself if you aren’t interested in him.
6. If you’re doing sports activities… This adds a certain lifecycle to proceedings. There’s health and safety, there’s planning, and there’s a formal schedule. So, you can get that competitive edge and learn about each other without having to grudge through draining small talk. It puts less pressure on each other, and you can pass the time irrespective of the company. So, you can be assured that you’ll have a fun time and learn a new skill without putting pressure on yourself.
7. Tell a friend to call you. If you aren’t quite sure of the vibe with the person you’re talking to, don’t put yourself in an odd position. Make sure you tell friends where you’re going or what you plan to do. As a result, you will feel safer. Read the red flags and don’t ignore that he never responds to your texts or doesn’t support you. Plus, it also means you can control the terms of your exit should you need one.
8. Stop overthinking it. It’s not like every person you ever meet needs to serve a purpose. Let yourself get free of that mentality and instead, do what feels right in the moment. If you’re having a great time with your date, stay as long as it feels right to do so. There’s really no reason to put a limit on things.

So, in short, there is no simple answer to how long a first date should last. It depends on how much you like them, who you are, and what your intentions are. Remain chill and give yourself a minute to reflect on what you want out of the first date.