How Men Fall In Love: 8 Things They Need To Fall Hard, According To A Guy

Why do we fall in love with the people we do when we do? On the surface, there’s not much rhyme or reason to it, but if you take a closer look at it, you might be able to find an explanation. Of course, it’s important to recognize that men fall in love a little differently than women. It’s not always just about finding the right person but rather feeling certain things and finding the right set of circumstances. Here’s how men actually fall in love and what they need for it to happen.

  1. Physical attraction Yes, this seems obvious, but it’s at the top of the list for a reason. Men are typically more visual creatures. That means the first step in falling in love with most men is liking someone’s physical appearance. I know it sounds shallow, but most guys aren’t interested in the whole package if they don’t like how it looks on the outside. Once he has that initial attraction, things can start to build from there.
  2. Quality time together This might sound a little weird, but men can fall in love just from being around the other person. We probably won’t fall head over heels just from sending messages back and forth online. We’re more likely to fall in love with someone who they can see and who is always around. That means you don’t want to be too coy and play hard to get. That might pique a guy’s interest in you for the short term, but he’s not going to fall in love with a woman who’s playing games and making him worry about where he stands.
  3. The ability to make you happy Men are often happy when they know they can make someone else happy. It makes them feel good when we’re contributing to someone else’s happiness. It makes us feel more connected with the other person. It also makes us feel useful and appreciated, which is always a good thing in relationships. If you’re hoping that a guy falls for you, just let him know that he makes you happy.
  4. Acceptance This is a big thing for most guys. Like anyone else, we want to be around someone who understands us. But guys also need someone who accepts us too. Nobody is perfect, and only a small percentage of super egotistical guys actually think that they are. Most of us want to be with someone who knows we have flaws but isn’t always trying to change us. When we feel that acceptance and understanding from someone, it’s much easier to fall for them.
  5. Feeling important Let’s face it, who doesn’t want to feel like someone else’s top priority? Men need to feel like we’re essential and matter to the other person. We also need to be told this explicitly because most guys aren’t great at picking up on subtle clues. When a guy has a woman tell him that he’s special, it means something. We start to swoon a little and it becomes much easier to fall in love with you
  6. The ability to see a future together In a practical sense, guys sometimes need to envision a future with someone before we can truly fall for them. Obviously, there’s not a whole lot that you can do to make this happen. It’s all about how we think the future will look like if we stay with you. The easier it is to imagine a life together and being compatible long-term, the easier it is to fall in love with you.
  7. Inspiration For men, a lot can change when we feel supported and inspired. Deep down, we crave being with someone who makes us want to do better and be the best version of ourselves. We love the feeling we get when there’s a woman bringing out the best in us. It makes us fall for her and think that she could be the one. Hopefully, that feeling goes both ways.
  8. Sexual chemistry The old cliche is at least a little true: guys are always thinking about sex. Much like physical attraction is essential, most of us need to feel sexual chemistry with someone to fall for them. It doesn’t necessarily have to be the best sex of our lives, but the sexual tension has to be there. It’s just one more way that a guy can forge a connection with someone on his way to being completely in love with her. I mean, it’s hard to stay in love with someone if both people aren’t happy with their sex life. In other words, if the connection is there in bed, it’s easier to find that strong connection in other ways too.
Bryan Zarpentine graduated from Syracuse University and lives in upstate New York, where he writes largely about the world of sports. His work has appeared on Franchise Sports and WSN, among others. You can find him on Twitter @BZarp.