Somatic narcissists thrive on physical appearance and use their bodies as tools to manipulate and control the people around them. Their sense of self-worth is often tied to how attractive, fit, or sexually appealing they are, and they know how to wield this to gain power in relationships. Here are the ways somatic narcissists use their bodies to get what they want and maintain control.
1. They Flaunt Their Physical Appearance to Gain Attention
Somatic narcissists know how to use their looks to captivate an audience. They often make a point of showing off their bodies, whether it’s through their clothing, posture, or how they present themselves in public. By drawing attention to their appearance, they manipulate others into constantly validating their looks, reinforcing their need for admiration.
2. They Use Charm and Seduction as a Weapon
For somatic narcissists, seduction isn’t just about attraction; it’s a tool for control. They often use their physical allure to manipulate others into doing what they want, whether it’s through flirtation, sexual advances, or creating a sense of intimacy. Once someone is hooked, they can exploit the connection to get their way.
3. They Display Their Bodies as Symbols of Power
To a somatic narcissist, physical fitness, attractiveness, or sex appeal equates to dominance. They may constantly show off their muscles, emphasize weight loss, or dress provocatively to assert power over others. This physical superiority feeds their sense of control, making others feel insecure or inferior by comparison.
4. They Weaponize Sexuality to Control Relationships
Somatic narcissists often use sex as a form of manipulation. They may withhold intimacy to punish their partners or use it to win favor after an argument. Their sexual allure becomes a bargaining chip in relationships, where they control when and how intimacy is given or taken away, keeping their partner emotionally hooked.
5. They Thrive on Physical Compliments to Feed Their Ego
Somatic narcissists need constant validation of their looks. They will often fish for compliments or comments about their appearance to elicit admiration from others. This relentless need for praise feeds their inflated ego and allows them to gauge who they can manipulate based on the attention they receive.
6. They Exploit Vulnerability by Playing the Victim
A somatic narcissist might strategically use their body to elicit sympathy. They may claim to be sick, injured, or exhausted, using their physical vulnerability to control others’ emotions. Drawing attention to their health or well-being, they manipulate those around them into providing extra care, attention, or leniency.
7. They Engage in Competitive Displays of Physical Superiority
In social situations, somatic narcissists love to show off their physical prowess. Whether it’s through intense workouts, constantly talking about their fitness routine, or subtly competing with others for the spotlight, they use their bodies to establish dominance. This often leaves others feeling inadequate or envious, feeding the narcissist’s sense of superiority.
8. They Create Jealousy Through Physical Attraction
Somatic narcissists intentionally create jealousy by flaunting their attractiveness or flirting with others in front of their partners. They enjoy making their partner feel insecure about their looks or desirability, using jealousy to maintain emotional control. This keeps their partner on edge, constantly seeking reassurance and validation.
9. They Project Physical Perfection to Mask Insecurity
Though they project an image of physical perfection, somatic narcissists often use their bodies as a shield to hide deep-seated insecurities. They spend excessive time on grooming, fitness, or cosmetic enhancements to present themselves as flawless. This facade of perfection helps them control how others perceive them, masking their inner vulnerabilities.
10. They Use Physical Presence to Intimidate
Somatic narcissists will often use their body language and physical presence to dominate a room. Whether standing too close, maintaining intense eye contact, or adopting an imposing posture, they use these subtle physical cues to assert control. Their body becomes a tool to unsettle and intimidate those around them, creating an imbalance of power.
11. They Manipulate Through Constant Self-Comparison
Somatic narcissists are often obsessed with comparing themselves to others and making those comparisons known. Whether it’s subtle digs about someone’s weight, fitness level, or attractiveness, they manipulate people by making them feel inadequate. This tactic puts them in a superior position, as others feel the need to “keep up” or seek validation.
12. They Use Public Displays of Affection to Control Their Partner
Somatic narcissists often use public displays of affection (PDA) to show off their relationship as a way to prove their desirability. By being overly affectionate or sexual in public, they control their partner’s image and make others envious of their “perfect” relationship, while their partner might feel used as a prop.
13. They Weaponize Fitness and Health Obsessions
Somatic narcissists often obsess over their fitness and diet, turning their healthy habits into a way to assert moral superiority. They will judge or shame others who don’t meet their standards of physical fitness, using their discipline as a weapon to belittle others and reinforce their sense of control.
14. They Play Hot and Cold with Physical Intimacy
Somatic narcissists know how to manipulate through inconsistency. They may be overly affectionate and attentive one moment, then pull away or withhold affection the next. This emotional rollercoaster keeps their partner off-balance and emotionally dependent, constantly trying to win back the narcissist’s physical attention and approval.
15. They Exploit Age and Beauty Standards to Stay on Top
Somatic narcissists are highly aware of societal standards of beauty and age, and they use these standards to their advantage. They may constantly compare their appearance to others, especially as they age, or mock those who don’t meet societal beauty norms. This fixation helps them maintain a sense of superiority, leveraging societal pressures to keep others feeling inadequate.