How To Be Good At Kissing If You Worry You’re Not

Making out is totally underrated, and the importance of kissing in our relationships, no matter how casual they are, can’t be overstated. If you worry that you’re not very good at locking lips, don’t worry. Here are some tips to help you get good at kissing. You’ve got this!

1. Ask for consent. Something as simple as asking your partner if it’s okay to kiss them already proves that you’re going to be good at it. It shows that you respect boundaries and that you care enough about them to make sure they’re feeling it too instead of just going ahead and taking what you want. Consent is sexy!
2. Focus on the moment. Kissing is sometimes a precursor to sex and most people often focus on getting to the deed itself rather than enjoying where they’re at right now. Good sex requires good kissing, which is why you should be present and focus on enjoying that part of the experience. Having a good kiss isn’t just about locking lips but being present in body and mind. In fact, good kissers can always sense when their partners aren’t present in the moment because the chemistry is usually off.
3. Maintain eye contact. If you’re having trouble staying in the moment and you’re too in your head, try making eye contact with your partner as you kiss them or in the few seconds you pull away from one another. You can start off with short glances and then move to prolonged eye contact as you get more comfortable with it. Keeping eye contact establishes trust and is most definitely a sexy way to flirt with your partner while kissing.
4. Take it slow. The slower it is, the more likely you are to be good at kissing. Don’t be in a rush and don’t let the excitement of your attraction to them allow to to move too quickly. Take your time to savor the moment with them until you both can’t help but move to the next level. Resist the urge to take off your clothes before you have kissed enough. You can try dedicating a few minutes to kissing alone before you can try other forms of foreplay.
5. Ask your partner what they like. It seems like a silly question, but you might be surprised to find out all the little ways your partner loves being kissed that they didn’t know how to ask for. Instead of doing it wrong so that your partner ends up hating it, why not just ask them? This is also a chance to tell them what you like and dislike during kissing. You can even make it a playful game where you demonstrate your preferences to each other.
6. Watch your teeth. Ever kissed someone and then gone home with sore lips? (You’re lucky if you haven’t experienced it.) Some minor nibbling is sexy during kissing but if someone is literally chewing your lips, you’re gonna hate kissing for the rest of your life. If you have to use your teeth, be very gentle to avoid hurting your partner. Otherwise, the tongue and lips are enough to have a good kiss.
7. Be gentle. Unless you both need some pain to gain pleasure during intimacy or are into aggressiveness, kissing should be gentle. Avoid getting carried away to an extent of bruising your partner. Again, this plays into the slow and steady approach.

More ways to be good at kissing

1. Pay attention to your partner’s body language. They might be trying to hint at what they like during kissing, so pay attention and reciprocate if you want to be good at it. If they respond with enthusiasm, it means you’re doing well. If they introduce the tongue, they’re possibly telling you that they like it and are inviting you to play along.
2. Don’t neglect other body parts. You’ll be an even better kisser if you can arouse your partner by exploring other body parts during kissing. You can gently kiss their face, ears, neck, chest, or back. Alternatively, as you lock lips, your hands could be stroking their hair or caressing their chest. Be creative, explore, and observe how your partner is responding.
3. Go with the flow. A good kisser knows when to stop and when to keep things rolling. Don’t force anything. If it feels right, keep doing it. But if something feels off and the chemistry is nonexistent, take it slow or just stop. Stick to what’s working and what you’re both enjoying.
4. No drooling please. You want your lips soft and wet for smooth smooching, but you most definitely don’t want to be drooling. It’s almost always a turn-off for pretty much everyone. Maintain a balance such that your lips aren’t too dry and you’re also not involving too much saliva. If you feel like you need to take a second to swallow, do so.
5. Throw in a word or two. Don’t be afraid to flirt with your partner during kissing. While your tongue and lips are busy doing their job, it’s okay to pause and just tell your partner how cute they are and how badly you want them. It’s a playful game of pleasure, not library or an exam room where you’re not allowed to talk. However, keep the chat to a minimum. Sharing what Jackie in accounting told you at work on Tuesday can wait.
6. Practice good hygiene. This is basic knowledge but we can’t emphasize it enough. We’re not just talking about oral hygiene but also your body hygiene. Shower and wash well with soap and water, moisturize your skin, and top it up with some great cologne/perfume. You want to be smelling nice and fresh before you start kissing someone as this will boost your confidence too.