Sometimes you just want to date around rather than getting into a serious relationship, and that’s cool. You don’t have to be looking for true love to enjoy something chill and laid-back with a guy. If you find someone you like, here’s how to ask him out casually without making it a big deal.
- Make your intentions very clear. You have to be upfront and honest with the guy about what you want and don’t want. You might be all for casual dating and not letting things get too serious while he’s looking to take things to the next level. Make sure you’re on the same page before you get into things so no one gets hurt.
- Keep your hangouts lighthearted. Go on fun, relaxed dates like trips to arcades and amusement parks, or beach days and house parties. Fancy dinners and serious dates are great if you’re trying to really romance someone, but if you’re just looking to keep things casual, there’s no reason to put yourselves in a potentially awkward situation by taking anything too seriously.
- Keep your boundaries clear and equal. Keeping things casual looks different for everyone. Some casual partners don’t want to meet each other’s families. Some don’t want to have too many serious talks because it takes things to a more intense level. Decide what you’re both comfortable with and just make sure that you’re both on the same page.
- Suggest group dates. If you ever feel like the relationship is moving to a more serious level that you may not be comfortable with, start suggesting group hangouts instead of one-on-ones. Hanging out with a bunch of mutual friends or even just one other couple can take a lot of pressure off you and your partner. When going out with other friends, you can suggest things like karaoke nights, pub crawls, or concerts.
- You might want to avoid talks of future plans. This one is completely dependent on the people in the relationship and what you’re comfortable with. Some may think that talking too in depth about what each of you want for your future might be getting too serious in a casual relationship, considering talks of the future can often lead to the topics of marriage and kids. If you’re trying to keep the relationship light and pressure-free, talk more about the here and now and live in the present moment.
- Keep your physical boundaries clear. Make sure you’re still giving yourself your sanctuary, your private space to unwind outside of whatever arrangement you have with this guy. In serious relationships, especially those that involve cohabitation, you share everything. One of the best parts of singlehood is still having your bedroom (and your full apartment/house, maybe) all to yourself.
- Stay on the same page about exclusivity. Casual relationships tend to be open relationships, but not always. This is something that you will most likely decide at the beginning when discussing and clarifying intentions. Some people in casual relationships want to maintain the freedom to meet, talk to, and date other people and some want to keep it exclusive but still casual. Just figure out what it is that you want and what your partner wants and then come to an agreement.
- Be honest about what you both want. Casual relationships are fun and carefree and can be just what you’re wanting and needing in your life for a season. There is a strong possibility that one or both of you will want something more serious down the road, but cross that bridge when you get to it. For now, just enjoy all the light-heartedness and joy of keeping things casual. You never know what could happen down the line!
