How To Catch And Keep A Guy’s Interest

There’s a guy who’s caught your eye and you’re desperate to get to know him better and potentially date him. You want to get him to not just notice you but want you too. It sounds like a tough task, but there are ways to make it happen! Here’s how to catch and keep a guy’s interest.

  1. Be supportive and don’t judge him for being vulnerable. Men are often treated negatively when they show any signs of vulnerability, which is very unfair to them. To catch a guy’s interest, don’t be one of the ignorant people who shames him when he shows any sign of emotion. Listen to him when he talks about something that hurts or bothers him. Give him advice if he asks for some for his worries or anxieties. Be his shoulder to cry on. Show him that he can be open with you and he’ll know you’re a good person to be with.
  2. Have your own life together. It’s the 21st century and good men are interested in independent and capable partners. Don’t go seeking a relationship when your life is falling apart! Be in control of your finances, have a job that is decently stable (especially if you’re above a certain age) and be smart about managing your life. A guy will be interested in someone who wants him, not needs him!
  3. Be interested in his interests and hobbies. You don’t have to pretend to love a guy’s hobbies or feign a similar passion for them. Instead, just show an interest in them. Ask about them or ask him to teach you if you’re not familiar with it, or ask him what he likes about them. Accompany him to a couple of activities related to his hobbies, retain a little information about them, and happily listen to him rave about them!
  4. Steer clear of any controlling behavior. No one has the right to control another person. You should not under any circumstances go after a guy with the intention of molding or shaping him into your dream man. You should not enter a relationship to constrict a man of his freedom. Not only will this send him running for the hills, but it’s also just terrible behavior! A guy is interested in someone who accepts him as he is.
  5. Show off your intelligence in conversations. Show off your smarts and knowledge of current events in conversations with the guy you’re into. Intelligent conversations allow you both to connect on a deeper level and will show you if you’re mentally compatible. Don’t be afraid to disagree with him, voice your own opinions, and challenge his perspectives on the world – respectfully, of course. A guy’s interest is easily won by someone who is an independent and intellectual thinker!
  6. Don’t play weird dating games. There are all sorts of weird “rules” in dating, but let’s call them what they are: mind games. These games include not texting back right away, “testing” men by manufacturing scenarios, trying to make him jealous, or playing hard to get. These games are disrespectful, harmful, and counter-productive. Most men hate these types of games and will become disinterested if you play them.
  7. Have fun and have humor. Being able to laugh and have a good time, even in not-so-great scenarios, is a valuable trait. It’s sure to grab a guy’s interest because it tells him you won’t take life too seriously. As an added bonus, a usually humorous outlook means that he’ll know that when you’re being serious, he needs to be serious, too.
  8. Be honest about your emotions and thoughts. Communicate your intentions, thoughts, and emotions in a productive manner to the person you’re interested in. Don’t say you’re fine when you aren’t. Don’t tell him he’s doing great when he isn’t. Don’t keep things bottled up, only for them to explode later. Really, all you have to do is communicate. A guy will appreciate someone who talks to him genuinely and doesn’t make him have to play guessing games!
  9. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. Some people make the mistake of putting on a mask to win over the guy they like. Don’t fall into this trap. Show him who you really are instead of hiding behind layers of pretense. You will fail to maintain lies as time goes on and it’s very hurtful to behave this way. A man you’ll want to be with will accept you as you are, so show your true self and let him decide if that interests him. The good news? Most men love someone who isn’t afraid to be themselves!

A guy’s interest doesn’t have to be hard-won. Be respectful, kind, honest, and your true smart, independent self, and you’ll be able to catch the eye – and heart – of the man you’re into.

Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia