It’s becoming more common for women to date multiple guys at once, and why shouldn’t we? Guys have been doing it for ages, and this practice, known as rotational dating can be really beneficial (not to mention efficient) if you’re short on time but looking for a little fun. As long as everyone is on the same page, there’s nothing wrong with doing this, but it does take work. Here are some tips if you decide to see a few different men simultaneously.
- Be honest. If you’re dating two or more men at the same time, you’re not going to get away with hiding it. You can try, but at some point, one of them will find out about the other. Then feelings will get hurt or you’ll just be accused of being a liar, a cheat, or worse. You should tell the guy early on that you’re seeing other people. You can even talk about why you made this choice. Whatever you do, don’t try to hide it. That never turns out well.
- Use clear communication. Let the men you’re dating ask you questions and give straightforward answers. They’ll likely want to know if you’re sleeping with all the men you’re dating. You don’t have to be specific, but do let them know what you’re doing to practice safe sex. This leads to the next point…
- Practice safe sex. You can date multiple men at once and decide not to have sex with any of them. If you are sleeping with any of them, however, safe sex is critical. You have to assume that since you’re seeing other people and possibly sleeping with them, they likely are too. This means you’re essentially having sex with everyone they’re having sex with. Always use condoms and dental dams. Get tested for STIs regularly. Share your results and expect your partners to do the same.
- Get a good calendar for your phone. There’s nothing more embarrassing than planning a date with two different men on the same night. Use it regularly to plan your time. Set alerts if you have a hard time remembering dates. There are many good calendar apps to choose from, but the simple ones are usually the best.
- Take time for yourself. Dating is fun and exciting, but you need to make sure that you have time to be alone, reflect on the week, think about who you’ve been dating, and even if you want to continue dating them. You can’t possibly offer anything to a partner if your tank’s not full for you.
- Don’t forget about your friends. Your friends are just as important as any man you’re dating. Spending time with friends can be a low-key way to relax and have fun. They will enjoy hearing your stories and they may give you insight on the men you date you haven’t picked up on. Take a step back from romance once in a while and remember who you are outside of it.
- Get good sleep. It takes a lot of energy to date multiple men at once, and if you’re not getting enough sleep, you won’t be much fun to hang out with. Make sure that you can get at least a few nights a week to yourself where you can enjoy your own bed and sleep alone.
- Decide on your relationship saturation level. This is the number of relationships you can maintain at one time while not wearing yourself out and still being able to make the guys you’re seeing happy. Relationship saturation is a level that’s different for everyone, and it might take some time for you to figure out what works for you. It may be only two or it could be five. The relationships you have could be a factor to consider as well. If one of the men you’re seeing lives far away and is only in the city once a month, he obviously won’t take as much of your time and energy as someone that lives around the block and wants to see you several times a week. Don’t forget to consider the relationships outside your dating schedule.
- Don’t be afraid to change your plan. You need to consider your reason for dating multiple men at once. Is it for fun? Are you not ready for a relationship? Are you dating more than one man because you want to increase your chances of meeting Mr. Right that much faster? Your reasons for practicing rotational dating can change. You may meet one man that you want to explore a deeper relationship with. If that’s the case, it’s perfectly fine to decide to stop seeing the others. You might be offered a promotion at work that is going to take up large amounts of your time. If you want to take that promotion, know that you can decide to stop seeing some or all of the men you’ve been dating.
At the end of the day, how you date is up to you. Clear communications and honest can make the experience more enjoyable for everyone. Be honest, be safe, and enjoy yourself.
