You know you like him and you can definitely see yourself developing real feelings for him, but does he feel the same? If he’s not being super upfront about where he stands and what he feels for you, there are other ways in which you can find out what he wants from you. Here are a few ideas.
Test the waters.
If you’ve only been “hanging out” (what does that even mean?!) or seeing each other for a few days or weeks, it might feel OTT to blatantly ask him where he sees you guys going. However, you can tease out what he’s thinking about you by asking him general questions about relationships and if he’s interested in anything long-term.
Express what you want.
One of the best ways to find out what a guy really wants from you is to express what you’re looking for and see how he responds. You’ll be able to tell by his reaction where he stands. A guy who looks away and breathes heavily when you mention that you’re looking for a committed relationship? Well, that tells you everything you need to know.
Watch what he does.
He might flirt with you like he’s got zero shame, but forget all that and focus instead on how he treats you. Does he leave your messages on “read” for days at a time? Does he prioritize his mates over you? Those are signs you’re way down on his priority list and he’s not really looking for anything serious with you.
Stop contacting him.
You might not think anything of always being the one to initiate contact with him, but he’s supposed to make some effort otherwise it points to him not being that interested. Besides, how can he miss you if you’re always texting him? So, back off a little and let him come to you. You’ll quickly see if he ever thinks of you.
Check his texting personality.
What does he always want to talk about? That will give you a real clue into where his head’s at. If he only ever pulls the conversation into dirty talk, no matter how much you try to have a deep chat, that’s a clear sign he’s only after a fling.
Notice what he does when you’re down.
When you hit a bump on life’s road, does he run to your rescue? Does he really show that he cares, such as by calling you to see how you are? Or does he disappear off the map? If he’s interested in something real with you, he’s going to support you from day one and you’ll be able to feel that he cares.
Ask him about his life.
If he can open up to you about his life, thoughts, and feelings, that’s a really good sign that he’s letting you in. This means you have a real chance to build something outside the bedroom too.
Check his word.
You know what they say: if someone can keep their small promises, they’re more likely to keep bigger ones. Now, when he says he’ll call you later in the day or he’ll meet up with you on the weekend, does he follow through with his actions or does he leave you hanging and confused about what he wants? Which brings us to the next point…
Notice where he takes you.
When he invites you out, does he take you to a restaurant he knows you’ll love? Does he take you to a place where you can really talk and get to know each other? Does he make an effort into planning your dates? This all points to him making a real effort to impress you. On the other hand, if he’s always dragging you to the bar for drinks or he invites you out with his mates every single time, it’s clear he’s not keen on having quality time with you.
Is he consistent?
Consistency is one of the most important things to look for when trying to suss out a guy you like. A guy who wants to be with you is going to give you clear, consistent messages, not mixed messages that make you want to pull your hair out because they’re so frustrating. He’s not going to blow hot and cold or leave you confused about whether or not he likes you.
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