How To Find A Balance Between Independence And Connection In Your Relationship

When you’re in a relationship, it can be tempting to throw individuality to the wind and go all-in on your partnership. However, just because you might want to be together 24/7 doesn’t mean you should be. Here’s how to find a balance in love so that you can remember who you are as a unique individual rather than just someone’s girlfriend.

  1. Cultivate relationships with your friends and family. While your relationship with your partner requires effort and focus, that shouldn’t come at the expense of all the other important connections in your life. If you want to find a balance in love, it’s important to give the same love and care to your relationships with your family members and friends as you do to your romantic partner. You’ll find so much more fulfillment and joy this way, and it truly is the healthier option.
  2. Practice self-care. This is good advice for all human beings regardless of their relationship status, but it’s especially true when you are coupled up. Having a regular self-care practice, whatever that means to you, will not only ensure that you’re not pouring from an empty cup but it will help you find and maintain a balance in love. Whether it’s doing yoga, going swimming, meditating, or even taking time to read a book in bed every night, take time for yourself.
  3. Pursue hobbies and interests that are entirely your own. While it’s important and fun to have interests in common with your partner, it’s equally as vital that you have hobbies and pastimes that are all for you. Maybe you’re into crafting or you’ve always wanted to learn Spanish. Whatever it is, make time to pursue these things separate from your relationship. There’s plenty of time to enjoy shared interests with your partner too.
  4. Give each other space. It’s much easier to find a balance in love when you have the space you need to breathe and exist as an individual rather than just part of a couple. The space you give one another should be literal as well as figurative. Appreciate the fact that as strong as you are as a unit, you’re also two separate people with your own thoughts, feelings, and lives. Honor that and give it grace. Your relationship will be much better for it.
  5. Be okay with doing things on your own. One of the best parts of being in a relationship is having someone to do stuff with, be it going grocery shopping or being your plus-one to a cousin’s wedding. However, you should also be cool doing things on your own still. Take yourself out for coffee one morning or go to your best friend’s birthday bash without your partner one time just because you can. It’ll remind you that even if you weren’t in a couple, you’d be just fine.
Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia