You were totally over your relationship and couldn’t bear spending another second with your boyfriend so you broke up with him and walked away. The problem is that now, you realize you’ve made a massive mistake and you seriously regret breaking up with your ex. How do you get him back, this time hopefully for good? Here are the steps you need to take.
- Do some serious soul searching. Before you go any further, you have to get real with yourself. Do you really regret breaking up with your ex or are you just lonely? Maybe you’re just frustrated with the dating scene or you’re afraid he’s going to move on before you do. Of course, it’s totally possible that you really do miss him and want to get back together, but make sure you get your motivations straight before proceeding.
- Determine where he stands. He may be giving you signs or even telling you outright that he wants to get back together, so this could be pretty easy. However, if you’re not sure if he’s on the same wavelength as you, you’ll need to find out where his head is at. If he already has another girlfriend or seemed pretty relieved when you broke up, I wouldn’t get your hopes up for a happy reunion.
- Apologize to him for giving up on the relationship. You’ll have to be upfront and tell your ex that you regret breaking up with him and that you were wrong to do so. If he wanted to work on things but you just had enough because you couldn’t be bothered to iron out your differences, you need to atone for that. He’s not going to want to get back together if he thinks there’s any chance of a repeat of the past.
- Have a serious conversation about what went wrong and how you’ll change it. You obviously broke up for a reason, and even if it wasn’t a good one, it happened. In order to move forward, you need to be open with each other about what happened and how things will be different if you give it another go. This kind of communication is vital and necessary, so you’ll have to get past the awkwardness and go for it.
- Be honest with him about why you want to get back together. Sure, things will be different this time and you really regret breaking up with him, but chances are your ex will want to know why you’ve suddenly had a change of heart. This is another reason that early self-reflection period is so important. You want to have a good answer for him here for sure.
- Commit to making things work this time. If he’s game to get back together and you’re ready to try again, be sure that you’re totally committed to sticking it out this time even when the going gets tough. Sure, you still need relationship boundaries and deal breakers, but if your problems are possible to overcome, make sure you’re ready to do so.