One of the best parts about being in a relationship is getting to be physical with your partner. Learning their boundaries and figuring out some of your own. Even more so, you get to make mistakes in front of each other and go on a shared journey together. You can learn how to be better at relationships. Make no mistake, it’s a learned skill, and no one is born a perfect partner. For example, as you know each other more, your physical intimacy will increase, and things like sex and the all-important make-out session will improve tenfold. Here’s how to have an epic kiss.
- Check-in first. It’s really important that, no matter how long you’ve been together, you still check in for consent. Read this in their body language and in their enthusiastic agreement. You will be able to relax into the moment. Being comfortable is the first stage to be able to experiment. To reach outside of your comfort zone. This means that, if you feel safe and heard, you are more likely to just tell your partner how you like to be kissed. You can evaluate what works and what doesn’t. With time, you’ll be having perfect moments, not just because of fate, but because of your hard work in the relationship.
- Set the scene. Don’t be afraid to put on some music or light a candle or put a few petals down on the bed. Just make sure you sweep them away before you get down to business. Otherwise, you’ll find petals in strange places in the morning. This romantic gesture shows that you still want to impress your partner. That you want them to feel wanted and to know how much you love and appreciate them. By showing that you don’t take the physical side of the relationship for granted you demonstrate that you value them. This level of care and intimacy will deepen your make-out sessions.
- Take your time. Don’t go straight in for the kiss. Build up some tension and don’t be afraid to tease your partner. Be cheeky. Chase them around the flat, or pin them against a wall. Kiss this cheek or just miss their mouth, or nibble their ear. Touch their collarbone or neck and give them the shivers. We all need to be warmed up, so to speak, in order to tap into our attraction and desire. Where’s the rush?
- Communicate. Try to tell each other what you want as you touch each other and kiss. It might feel odd at the start, but once you introduce honesty and instruction, you will feel really empowered and sexy. By adding intention and taking down your defenses to receive feedback, you create a really safe space. This is where your best make-out sessions will happen, not when you’re both scrambling in the dark and too stressed to talk to each other. Take away those unspoken rules or relationship pressure and figure out how the physical side of things works with your relationship. Ignore what the world tells you if you aren’t a super touchy-feely person. Your relationship is as valid as people who have sex every night.
- Stay comfortable. You won’t be able to experiment or tap into your own sexuality if you’re thinking about other things. Or thinking about what you should be doing. Focus on what you and your partner want. Don’t stress about orgasms as the only ‘end-point’ or ‘goal’ of making out or having sex. Just make each other feel good.
- Clean your room. Make sure you have the place to yourself. Check the basics. There’s nothing that kills a mood quite like the emergence of a housemate that you thought was out. Particularly if you share a wall.
- Make use of the walls. Or the sofa. Or the kitchen countertop. These articles of furniture are all your friends and offer some new angles when you’re making out. Get all those endorphins out and your body’s natural instincts will amp things up.
- Go light on the tongue. Wait until you feel more sure of yourself and run your tongue along their lips to check that they want you to keep going before you thrust your tongue in their mouth. Then, go slow.
- Find your own rhythm. This is the best way to ensure you’re both on the same page. You both work in tandem in all manner of ways to ensure you both get pleasure out of the situation. Don’t put pressure on one person, and try to reciprocate so that they feel good and desirable too.
So there you have it, a few ways to spice up your make-out sessions. Stick to the basics, and trust that with time your relationship and make-out sessions can only gain intensity. Relax, the right guy won’t lose interest over time, he’ll gain attraction day by day.