How To Know If You’re Getting Too Infatuated Too Soon

You’re not sure if you’re actually in love yet, but you do know that you’re totally obsessed with someone new. He’s all you can think, talk, or dream about and it’s driving you crazy in the best way. It’s always fun and exciting when you start to fall fast for someone but it can also be dangerous. Here are some signs that you are becoming too infatuated with a guy a little too soon and that you might want to tread lightly.

  1. You can’t think about anything other than him. It’s normal for your thoughts to be consumed with someone when your feelings for him are growing stronger and stronger by the day. There’s nothing wrong with letting your daydreams get a little carried away, but it can become a problem if you literally can’t think of anything else but this person. You have to remember that you still have a job and family and friends. You still have a life outside of this person and if you don’t allow yourself to focus on anything else but this new relationship, it could start causing some problems in the other areas of your life.
  2. They’re the topic of every conversation. It’s normal to get excited when you’re gaining feelings for someone new and everything is an adventure but, if you find that you can’t talk about anything else other than this person, it’s a sign that your infatuation is growing very quickly, maybe too quickly. You have to remember that there are other things that are worth talking about and your friends and family may not be too keen on constantly talking about your new love interest.
  3. You’re neglecting your other relationships. I’m sure that your friends will understand and give you a little bit of grace when it comes to your obsession with the new person in your life but you have to make sure that you’re not completely ignoring him or blowing him off for the person you’re dating. It’s understandable that you want to be around him, but if you’re shirking the other people that are important in your life, you’re not being fair to them and it’s a sure sign that you’re becoming too infatuated too soon.
  4. You overlook red flags. If you’re completely enamored with someone, it can be easy to overlook some signs that he might not be the person for you. If you’re infatuated with a guy, you’re not going to want to find out that there are things about him that you don’t like. You may be in denial about red flags that prove that he’s not who you think you are. If you’re ignoring or brushing things off about him that you know you shouldn’t, it could be a sign of becoming too infatuated too soon.
  5. You’re compromising things that are important to you. It can definitely be a sign of love when you care more about someone else’s happiness than your own. However, you have to make sure you’re not completely throwing away everything that matters to you just to appease a guy. The thing is, when someone loves you as much as you love him, he would never make you feel like you have to give up the things that make you who you are. If you feel as if their love or acceptance is conditional on you compromising certain things about yourself and you’re totally okay with that, it’s definitely a sign that you might be falling too hard too fast.
  6. You’ve started planning for the future before he’s mentioned it. If you’re already planning your wedding and honeymoon to this guy and you’ve only been on, like, two dates, it’s not exactly crazy, but you might just want to pump the breaks a bit. Of course, if you feel a strong connection to this person you’re going to want to imagine a future with him, but make sure to protect your heart at the same time. If you don’t know how he’s feeling yet and he hasn’t said anything about the future to you, there’s a good chance that he hasn’t made it there yet with their feelings for you. You don’t want to broach the subject too quickly and freak him out.
  7. You want to get real deep, real fast. When you start falling for someone, you want to know everything about him and all of their deepest, darkest secrets. Make sure you don’t come across as too intimidating with the depth though. It takes some people longer to feel comfortable with opening up and being vulnerable with a new partner. You also want to be cautious about how soon you reveal things about yourself that you consider private or extremely personal. If things end up not working out with this person, you may regret spilling some of your most intimate secrets.
  8. You’re losing touch with reality. When you start falling for someone, it’s easy to fall into a haze of daydreams and fantasies with your new lover but when you start to lose touch and neglect your normal day-to-day, this can be a sign of becoming too infatuated too soon. It’s okay to be filled with happy thoughts of someone that you really like but you can’t ignore other important things in your life like your job, your family, and your friends. Remember to frequently snap yourself out of it so that nothing in your life feels ignored and you don’t lose sight of what is actually happening in the here and now.
Shelby is a journalist and fiction writer raised in the South but built for the big city. She's a book nerd (well, an overall nerd, honestly) and coffee addict and obsessed with all things leather and lacy.

She has a bachelor’s degree in Mass Communication and Media Studies from Sam Houston State University and worked for her university newspaper, The Houstonian, as well as serving as a producer and part-time entertainment anchor for Cable 7 Huntsville. You can follow her on Twitter @shelby777.