How To Make Him Want You Again After He’s Lost Interest

While you should never act desperate to try to get a guy to be with you, if you’ve noticed that the guy you’ve been seeing seems much less interested in you than he used to, there are some things you can do to get yourselves back on track. Here are 10 to try.

  1. Focus on your own life. Now’s not the time to make the guy the center of your world and act like he’s worthy of being put on a pedestal. The most attractive thing about someone is when they’re living a life that they absolutely love. Be that person and you’ll see him become interested again. FYI, you should do this for you, not to make him want you.
  2. Exude confidence. Maybe you don’t feel too confident right now, but so what? Fake it ’til you make it, girl! When you’re confident instead of insecure, you’re immediately more interesting to be around. Confidence is what will make men gravitate towards you.
  3. Date other men. This might be the last thing you want to do when your heart’s set on someone else, but don’t waste your time waiting around for him. As long as you’re single and keen to have a relationship, you should be getting out there. Show him that you’ve got your own life and this will (hopefully) jumpstart him into wanting to be with you again. Of course, you should ask yourself if you even want a guy who has to risk losing you before realizing you’re the one for him.
  4. Pique his interest on social media. Now, you shouldn’t post tons of selfies to show him that you’re looking amazing because you’ll just come across as vain or desperate for attention. But the carefully-selected post or pic that shows him you’re having a fun time and living your life can do the trick to make him interested.
  5. Don’t always be there. Maybe you and your crush seem to be speaking less than you used to, mainly because he’s never making contact. Ugh. While this could make you want to get in touch and ask why he’s being so quiet, that will just make him pull further away from you. The best thing you can do is stop trying so hard. When he finally gets in touch, don’t quickly text him back or agree to see him even though you have other plans. That just sends the message that you’re waiting for him.
  6. Don’t check in on him. For the love of God, don’t send him a “just checking in with you” sort of text. It’s basically a nice way of saying, “Where the hell are you?” and no one wants to feel like they’re being scolded. Do your own thing and let him wonder why you’ve been so quiet for a change.
  7. Act like you don’t need him. If you make him think that you need him in order to be happy, that will just further make him lose interest because he’ll think you’re clingy. The best thing to do is behave like you don’t need him to call or see you. Just be “whatever” about stuff. Walk away from dates early because you have other things to do instead of hanging on for hours or trying to extend the date. End calls first. Make him make more effort.
  8. Ask him out on fun dates. Maybe you guys have got into a bit of a stale routine and it’s making your dates feel really boring. To prevent him from being bored, you need to shake things up. Instead of asking him out to a movie and dinner, invite him out to a really fun date, like ziplining or go-karting. Sometimes when you spend time with someone in a new way, this can make you see them differently.
  9. Don’t give too much information. The guy who went AWOL a while ago gets back in touch to see how you’re doing. Read: he just wants to get some info about your life before disappearing again. Don’t give him all the info he wants. Be mysterious. Hold onto your emotions instead of throwing them at him. Make him see that you’re interesting instead of an open book. If you hold back a bit, he’ll surely be curious about you and where you’re at.
  10. Be upbeat. The worst thing to do if it seems like your crush or partner is losing interest in you is to show them how anxious and angry you are. Yes, it’s hard to flip the switch sometimes, but you’ll be better off being positive and upbeat whenever you see the person. This will draw him to you much more than if you’re giving him your power by allowing him to make you feel down. In addition, you’ll be a breath of fresh air and he’ll want to be around you. That said, if something’s really gnawing at you, you shouldn’t hide what you feel.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.