Past relationships can be difficult to let go of, especially if they were serious and/or long-term. However hard it might be, it’s sometimes completely necessary to cut exes out of your life so that you can move on and be happy. What happens though, if your ex won’t stop reaching out to you? How do you respond to a test from your ex?
- Don’t. The obvious choice is to not respond at all. I know it’s easier said than done, but sometimes it’s the best thing that you can do, especially if your ex is texting you hurtful or harassing things. If anything they send you makes you feel as if you’re in danger of any kind, don’t respond and report them to someone.
- Be vague. If you do choose to respond, don’t think that you have to offer up any information about what you’re doing, where you are, or who you’re with. It’s none of your ex’s business what’s going on in your life and the best thing you can do is be very vague with the information you give to them. Don’t feel obligated to reveal any details because you don’t know if or how they’ll try to use them against you later. One-word answers with blunt punctuation are perfectly acceptable in these situations.
- Take your time. There’s no need to respond right away. Leave them on read for a while. You’re a hot commodity and you’ve got better things to do than sit by your phone and wait for a text from someone who let you go. If you choose to respond at all, make them sweat it out for a while. There’s no shame in it.
- Don’t react. Oftentimes, an ex will reach out in order to try and get a rise out of you. They might attempt to flaunt a new relationship in your face, guilt trip you in order to get you to take them back, or just be obnoxious in general. Whatever the reason, don’t give them what they’re after. Don’t react. If you reply to their message, give them one-word answers that are devoid of any kind of emotion. Trust me, it’ll drive them crazy and eventually, they’ll move on.
- Be confident in your decision. Whether you’re the one who ended the relationship or they were, you’ve made the decision to go your separate ways and you need to be firm and confident in that. Sometimes, it’s hard to let go of relationships because one or both of the people involved can’t seem to stay away from the other and keeps constant communication to the point where it could even feel like you’re still in a relationship. Don’t make it harder on yourself. Tread lightly when responding to a text from an ex. You don’t want to backpedal into a possibly toxic situation.
- Take the high road. Your ex might reach out to say something mean or underhanded to you. You can’t control what they say but you can control how you choose to react. Responding in a similar, unkind fashion is an easy and predictable response. It’s also playing right into whatever game they’re trying to taunt you with. Just be the bigger person and always take the high road. It might be the more difficult choice in the moment, but you’ll be so much happier you did.
- Live your best life. If you’re angry with your ex, the best revenge is to be having the time of your life. If you’re responding to any text messages from them, make sure that you’re emphasizing how great things are going for you and all of the good things happening in your life. Sure, you might be exaggerating a bit but you want your ex to know that you’re doing just fine without them and that your life is better than it’s ever been.
- Be hard to reach. Similar to taking your time to respond, be a difficult lady to reach. Keep your schedule full and take time for yourself, making sure to unplug and live in the here and now without being chained to your phone. If your ex reaches out to you and it’s difficult to get your attention, it’s going to tell them that you’re moving on and focusing on yourself. You don’t have time to linger in the past.
- Don’t apologize. Whatever you do, don’t apologize. Don’t apologize for not replying. Don’t apologize for not being chatty with them. Don’t apologize for your breakup. Just don’t apologize at all. You don’t owe them anything and you need to be confident and show them that you have no regrets. For whatever reason, your relationship didn’t work but it’s probably for the best, and hanging onto the past isn’t going to do either of you any favors. Don’t apologize for doing what’s best for you and keep your head held high.