When you can’t be with the person you love for whatever reason — they’re away for work, you’re living apart, etc. — it can be lonely and sad. You miss them dearly but don’t necessarily want to come out and say it. Luckily, there are lots of ways to say “I miss you” without actually saying the words. If you’re stuck for ideas, read on for inspiration.
- Use post-it notes to express affection. These are cute, low-effort, large-impact tactics. When you’re thinking about someone, or come up with a cute joke when you’re apart, this is the perfect time to deploy a Post-It note. Jot down your romantic sentiments or funny one-liners that remind your partner why you’re meant for each other and leave it in a communal place where you know they’ll visit soon. This will go way further than simply deciding to say “I miss you.” Wait for the gushing text saying that they got your message, as well as the confirmation that they miss you too.
- Give them little “Just because” gifts. These are really intimate, romantic gifts because they show how much you know a person. It’s all well and good wealthy people throwing their money around on big-ticket, cliched gifts like elaborate vacations and fancy dinners, but that isn’t as meaningful. It’s far better for someone to bring home some McDonald’s on the Friday before payday when you know they’ve worked long, hard days that kept you apart most of the week.
- Be the good guy. Give her the booth seat at restaurants. Get her a new stationary set or a pair of insoles when she complains about her knee pain flaring up again. There will be no reason to say “I miss you” because she’ll always know by how thoughtful you’re being.
- Surprises are your friend! These don’t have to be huge scale. You can still show that you miss someone just by doing kind, unexpected things, like taking the trash out at their apartment or getting to date night early to clean up the place when they’ve been feeling stressed or extra tired.
- Be bold. Planning bigger surprises also works because they show that you’re willing to try things out, experiment, and even get things wrong as you get to know each other. Yes, there are some gifts that are too risky for an independent woman, but we appreciate the gesture anyway because if you send a gift it means that the other person really does miss us. It’s also a show of vulnerability and lets your partner know that they are being listened to and respected.
- Plan vacations together. This can be anything from a cheap mini-break in the same county or a long road trip on another continent so long as you can plan it together. Logistics planning and Pinterest board ideas are always a fun way of sharing an experience while implicitly saying how much you’re looking forward to that shared quality time together.
- Request dates over email. Yes, in the age of Covid, date nights might be more remote or have to be planned long in advance. But to reignite the romantic flame, send the message that you miss them, or simply demonstrate intentionality and love, you can send them a cute email meeting request so that your time together is optimized. That shows how much you miss them and value their time.
- If you miss a date, earn it back. There’s nothing more important than reliability. If you missed a coffee date, send her a fiver for the coffee to enjoy by herself. Or, if you’re unavailable, send a pizza over. It shows your partner that you miss them and that you want them to look after themself.
- Get their friends involved. There’s no reason you have to do this alone — when you miss your partner, you miss their friends too. Get everyone together to catch up and plan something special for your shared contact. It’s likely that they miss them too! This will impress her friends, too.
- Whenever you think of them, tell them. The context doesn’t matter; it can be romantic or completely platonic situations that attract your attention. Either way, it will show your partner how much you feature in their life and vice versa.
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- Ask about their friends. It’s always nice to hear how you exist in other people’s minds and conversations when you’re not there in person. That’s why being involved in their life and following up shows you’re interested and that you mean business. It sends the message that you’re incredibly invested and that you miss them when you’re not together.
- Send them all the memes. This is a great way of aligning humor and showing that you’re still interested in developing the intellectual side of the relationship. This can be achieved through sending silly or nostalgic memes. The more unexpected, the better!
- Send midnight fun facts. Why be boring? Don’t hide the fact you’re awake at night, thinking about them. That’s an unspoken declaration that you miss someone. The ‘fun facts’ or one-liners are a transparent vehicle to start the conversation again even though you don’t have much else to say.
- Use open body language. This implicitly communicates that you miss someone without saying the words. Eye contact and open body language are key to showing eagerness when you meet someone. If you’re closed off when you meet up, they won’t think you missed them at all.
- Send postcards from your travels. It’s always fun to know that you’re part of a person’s thought process when they’re off in another place gaining new experiences. It shows that they feel strongly about you, and commit time to talk to you, even during really busy or exciting times.
- Buy them jewelry. Yes, it’s a classic, but it’s a classic for a reason. We all love iconic things, and that’s what bling is. It shows that you’re important enough to someone for them to invest in you, particularly when it’s a surprise. It shows you that they miss you with a big gesture.
- Be shameless about FaceTime. Ask for the level of communication that you want. The more interested you appear, the more communication that you will want from them. That’s a clear way of expressing your interest and showing that you like someone and miss them when they’re not there.
- Be involved in the little things. Lots of people who come and go in our lives only remember the big ticket, high-level issues. But if you remember their sister’s degree or the name of their first cat, you’re showing that you’re invested. It’s a good sign.
- Ask for voice notes before you go to bed. You might as well just say that you’re simping. But hey, it’s always a confidence boost for your partner because it shows how important they are to you. Hearing them say even a few words shows you miss them enough to want to be able to hear them for a few seconds.
- Focus on physical contact. If you want to say “I miss you,” say it with actions. It’s an easy way of showing interest and demonstrating that you’ve really missed her if you can’t keep your hands off her. Enough said.