You’re supposed to be happy and in love when you’re coupled up, but for some reason, you can’t stop fighting with your partner. At this point, you don’t even know when you’re arguing about half the time. Don’t worry — your relationship isn’t necessarily doomed just because you’re having more disagreements these days. Here’s how to get things back on the right track.
- Learn how to communicate. Half of the fights people in general have, not even just couples, could be solved immediately or even avoided if we all knew how to communicate better. If you know how to express your feelings clearly without casting blame or being overly aggressive, you might be surprised how much more receptive the other person is to hear what you’re saying and meet you halfway. Good communication skills won’t mean you’ll never disagree, but they will help you stop fighting with your partner quite so much.
- Stop making mountains out of molehills. We’re all guilty of building up a relatively minor issue into something way bigger than it should be when we’re in a mood. Stop that. When things aren’t a big deal — and let’s be real, most of the things we tend to argue about aren’t — don’t make them into one. Stay grounded in reality and unless it’s a fundamental issue that threatens the trust or care in your relationship, stay chill.
- Pick your battles. In addition to keeping a bit of perspective in your relationship, one of the best ways to stop fighting with your partner is by choosing your battles. So what if you picked up your partner’s socks from the bathroom floor twice this week? Does it really matter if they forgot to pick up milk on the way home from work even though you explicitly asked them to five minutes before they left?
- Get to the root of the issue. It’s pretty hard to stop fighting with your partner if you don’t know what it is that you’re fighting about. Are there deeper issues at play here? Do you have some deep-seated anger or resentment from a previous betrayal? Are you subconsciously unhappy? It’s important to really reflect on what’s going on to get to the bottom of what’s happening between you.
- If necessary, consider couples therapy. If you really care about your relationship but can’t seem to work out your problems on your own, consider going to couples therapy. Seeing a qualified professional can really provide additional perspective on the issues you’re facing as well as offer you guidance and skills on how to proceed. There’s no shame in asking for help.
