Do You Ruin The Good Things In Your Life? Here’s How To Stop Self-Sabotaging

Are you struggling to enjoy your life? It’s probably due to self-sabotaging behavior. Fears and insecurities are powerful; they create destructive decisions, which make it impossible to be happy. Here are 11 ways to stop self-sabotaging so you can live your best life:

  1. Face Your Fears. Are you afraid of falling in love? Moving to a new city? Getting rejected? Fear is a powerful thing and it’s probably keeping you from reaching your potential. The only way to get over fear is to face it. I know it’s not an easy thing to do, but what’s the alternative? Die knowing there were amazing things you avoided simply because you were scared? No thanks.
  2. Stop Listening To Everyone Else. Your life is yours. Remember that. Your family and friends might have opinions on how you should live, but at the end of the day, you have to follow your own arrow. If you try to make everyone happy, you’ll end up letting everyone down, especially yourself. Listen to that little voice inside your head.
  3. Don’t Live In The Future. What’s happening at this moment will determine your future. That’s why it’s so important to live in the present. Right now, it’s all about laying a base. You should be working hard, taking chances, and falling in love, so your future is a good one.
  4. Let Go Of Expectations. The horrible truth is, you don’t have control over what other people do. Humans have this little thing called free will. We can do whatever we want, whenever we want, with whoever we want. Thinking you can control someone or predict their behavior is unrealistic. Let go of expectations and let people show you who they are.
  5. Set Boundaries For Yourself. It’s easy to self-sabotage when you don’t set healthy boundaries for yourself. What do you need to accomplish in a month? What do you need to avoid this week? Setting boundaries will help you feel more in control and hopefully help you avoid sketchy situations. Just make sure you follow the boundaries you set.
  6. Stop Living In The Past. You thought you’d have your act together by the time you were this age, right? Join the club. We all have things we thought we’d accomplish by now but that’s because when we were younger, we had no idea what it was really like to be an adult. Now that you’re here, it’s time to stop torturing yourself for not living up to your childish goals. Focus on all you’ve accomplished and be proud of where you’re at.
  7. Don’t Sell Yourself Short. You can do anything you set your mind to. That’s a fact. We’re all born with the same amount of potential. Unfortunately, we’re not all confident enough to activate that potential. Remember, it’s never too late to believe in yourself and do something you never thought you could. If you sell yourself short, you’ll never become the person you want.
  8. Be Kind To Yourself. Talking negatively about yourself doesn’t make you humble, it makes you a self-sabotager. There’s so much hate in this world. Chances are you’re going to come across plenty of people who’ll want to bring you down. Don’t make it easier on them by bringing yourself down first. Pay attention to your negative self-talk so you can stop it in its tracks.
  9. Don’t Overthink Everything. Overthinking can be beneficial, but it can also be destructive. It all depends on what you’re thinking about. Most people spend time overthinking small, insignificant things from the past. While there’s nothing wrong with analyzing your actions in order to grow, you can’t spend time blaming yourself for past decisions. That’ll drive you nuts!
  10. Give Yourself A Pep Talk. You self-sabotage because you’re afraid of rejection. You don’t think you’re good enough to get what you want, but you are. Instead of letting your insecurities drag you down, use positivity to build yourself up. Every morning, look in the mirror and give yourself a pep talk. I know it sounds corny but it’s effective. Highlight everything you love about yourself. It’ll give you the energy needed to conquer the day, every day!
  11. Become Your Own Best Friend. Self-sabotagers don’t usually want to spend time alone. It makes sense that you’d want to run from yourself and your own negative thoughts, but you shouldn’t. The key to being happy is loving who you are. To do that, you need to know yourself. Start a new hobby, have a conversation in your head, masturbate, etc. The more you know, the more in love you’ll be.
Jordan White is a writer based in Scottsdale, Arizona with more than 8 years of experience. She graduated from Northern Arizona University with a degree in Rhetoric and Creative Writing in 2015 and while there, she wrote for The Daily Wildcat. She has since written for sites including FanBread, and, of course, Bolde. You can find about more her on Facebook. She has a passion for giving her audience something to laugh about and despises the heat more than anything.