How To Survive The Holidays After A Breakup

The holiday season is all about love and happiness. Unfortunately, that’s not easy to feel after a breakup. How do you mend your broken heart when all you see are happy people looking like real-life Hallmark characters? It’s possible. Here are 10 ways to survive a holiday breakup without losing your mind.

  1. Appoint A Spokesperson. This is the season for spending time with distant relatives and old classmates (socially distanced, of course). And while it’s great to reconnect, it means you’re going to be answering the same questions. How’s work? How’s your love life? Instead of having to be reminded of your breakup, appoint someone in your inner circle to be your spokesperson. Have them spread the word so you don’t have to keep telling people.
  2. Get Off Social Media. None of us have the healthiest relationship with social media. That’s why you should avoid it after a breakup, especially around this time of the year. Your Instagram will be cluttered will lovey-dovey pictures, and each one will break your heart. You don’t need that right now. You also don’t need to stalk your ex-boyfriend, which is what will happen. The best thing you can do for your mental health is to get off social media.
  3. Avoid Your Exes. You don’t just have to worry about this ex, you need to worry about every ex. Something about the holiday makes people come out of the woodworks. Maybe it’s the cool weather and all this talk about possibilities. Whatever the reason, your exes are going to be reaching out and you need to do your best to avoid them. Unless, of course, you want to date them again…which you don’t.
  4. Don’t Talk About It With Strangers. You may be inclined to discuss your breakup with anyone who’ll listen, but that’s a very, very bad idea. People mean well, but most of us love playing devil’s advocate. You tell a stranger about your ex and before you know it they’re convincing you to send a text message that blows up in your face. Keep your breakup to yourself, as much as you can.
  5. Keep Busy. Avoid the temptation of staying at home. I know it’s hard, but trust me, a busy schedule will keep you moving forward. Join a book club or sign up for a gym membership. Make sure you’re doing things that are healthy and leave you feeling fulfilled. It’s also a good idea to make sure your activities are with other people and not just yourself, where possible. People have a way of giving us energy and that’s something you need after a breakup.
  6. Sign Up For Dating Apps. Are you ready to move on from your ex? Contrary to popular belief, the holiday season is a good time to do that. There are a ton of people in town who would probably welcome a break from all that family time. That’s where you come in! Dating apps can help give you a confidence boost and introduce you to new people. I’m not saying you’ll find your soulmate, but you might.
  7. Leave The Booze Alone. You might think getting wasted will help you feel better, but it won’t. At least, it won’t help long-term. The more you drink, the more likely you are to do something that’ll make your life messy (i.e. sleeping with an ex-boyfriend). Keep your wits about you so you don’t accidentally entertain someone toxic.
  8. Don’t Cancel On Everything. You and your ex probably had a lot of holiday plans. Maybe you RSVP’d to several parties and planned on bringing them as your plus one. Who cares? Don’t cancel your plans because you’re now single. I know you’re sad, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. Be bold and go to (Zoom) parties by yourself. Don’t let your ex take this season from you — get out there and make memories.
  9. Accept The Breakup. You need to accept your relationship is over. It’s not easy, but it’s the only way you’ll be able to survive the holidays. If you ignore your emotions or keep expecting your ex to take you back, you’ll be an absolute wreck. Accept the breakup and feel the sadness. Some days, you’ll be in tears and that’s okay. Be patient and kind to yourself.
  10. Take Advantage Of The New Year. The holiday season is about taking chances. Use this breakup to fuel and guide you. Are there relationships you wish were stronger? Fix them. Are there places you’d like to see? Make plans to visit. You don’t have to wait until January 1 to shake things up — you can do it right now.
Jordan White is a writer based in Scottsdale, Arizona with more than 8 years of experience. She graduated from Northern Arizona University with a degree in Rhetoric and Creative Writing in 2015 and while there, she wrote for The Daily Wildcat. She has since written for sites including FanBread, and, of course, Bolde. You can find about more her on Facebook. She has a passion for giving her audience something to laugh about and despises the heat more than anything.