How To Tell If Another Woman Is Interested In Your Boyfriend

You know your relationship is solid and you’re pretty sure your guy would never cheat on you. However, if there’s another woman hovering around who seems to want him bad, it can freak you out. You don’t consider yourself the insecure or jealous type and yet you’re pretty sure she’s throwing herself at him. Are you just being paranoid? Not if these 11 things are happening.

  1. She contacts him at night. It’s one thing if he has a female friend who texts him every now and then, but quite another if she’s texting him after hours, like at 10 at night, and this happens on the regular. You don’t message someone that late in the evening if you don’t have a specific kind of relationship (or want that kind of relationship, at least).
  2. She finds excuses to chat to him. She needs his advice for something her co-worker did even though your BF is in a totally different industry. She asks him if he knows any builders in the area that can help with some home renovation even though he’s the furthest thing from a handyman you could get. If it seems like whenever she contacts him it’s always for some random reason, that should raise a red flag.
  3. She’s way too open with him. She got a cool piercing on her belly button so she sends him a pic of herself wearing a crop top to see what he thinks. Um, sure. Clearly, she’s trying to find any excuse to show him her body, and it’s also a way of her disrespecting your relationship with him. There are just some things you shouldn’t send to someone else’s boyfriend!
  4. She tries to get him closer to her. If she’s into him, she’s going to want to make their ties stronger and preferably make them closer geographically. So, she might say there’s a job opening in her company that he’d be perfect for or she thinks he’d love the boxing club she goes to every week.
  5. She needs his attention. She calls him up and is in tears, needing someone to talk to. Yeah, your guy is amazing and everyone loves his advice, but how did she survive before she knew him and why does she have to be leaning on the shoulder of someone else’s boyfriend? It’s so not cool. Surely she has other friends who can help her out.
  6. She ignores you. If you’re in the (unlucky) situation of having to cross paths with this woman who’s getting under your skin, you might find that when your boyfriend is around, she totally blocks you out. It’s like she can only see him, to the point where you start wondering if you’re completely invisible. It’s just her strategy to act like you don’t matter.
  7. She stares at him. You’re out with your boyfriend and his friends and she’s there too. You catch her staring at your guy a lot, even when he’s not looking her way. This is shady as hell, especially if it seems like she’s undressing him with her eyes. It’s clear that she’s attracted to him.
  8. She flirts with him. It could be subtle, but you see it – even though your boyfriend’s totally blind to it. She might touch his arm during conversation or make it her mission to sit right next to him even when it’s a group dinner. And you can bet she’ll always laugh the loudest when he cracks a joke, even when you know it wasn’t that funny.
  9. She complains about men. If she’s turning to your boyfriend to moan to him about how terrible all the men she’s meeting have been, it could be a way for her to be able to slip in a compliment like, “I wish more men were like you.”
  10. She stands up for him. If someone mentions what a terrible cook your boyfriend is or how he messes up every DIY project around the house, little miss boyfriend stealer will back him up and try to compliment him. Ugh. If she asks you about how your recent holiday was with your boyfriend, she’ll be sure to throw in how great your boyfriend is at making things fun. This behavior of trying to uplift him screams that she’s interested, but can also be a way to show you that she’s competing with you because she’s supporting him so much.
  11. She visits him when she knows you’re not there. It seems like a coincidence but your gut tells you otherwise. Whenever your boyfriend’s platonic friend who you suspect of being into him wants to see him, she’ll always drop by when you’re not around. Hmm. ¬†How freaking convenient!
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.