How To Tell If He’s Just Stringing You Along

How To Tell If He’s Just Stringing You Along ©iStock/BraunS

Most of us are guilty of either stringing someone along or being on some guy’s hook at some point in our lives. This happens when people aren’t really interested in a relationship, but would like to reserve the option for down the road in case nothing “better” comes alone. If a guy is stringing you along instead of committing or letting you go, you’ll probably relate.

  1. He only talks about a relationship in the future. He’s very firm about not wanting a relationship right now, but hints at the possibility of it happening in the future. He dangles the relationship carrot in front of you just to keep you from bailing and finding someone else.
  2. He never lets you completely walk away. If you start to give up hope or end things completely, he goes all out to drag you back into his game. He’ll do anything short of making you his girlfriend, because all he wants is to keep you as a possible option.
  3. He doesn’t always text you back. Sometimes you text like a real couple, sometimes it’s days of silence. He doesn’t respect you enough to not ignore you, and he intentionally doesn’t respond too quickly because that’s too boyfriend-y.
  4. He bails on you last minute. He always has some kind of excuse, but you can’t help but feel that something else came up that he chose over you. He doesn’t make you a priority, so you’re bound to get stood up now and then.
  5. There’s no PDA allowed around his friends. He would never allow this, because he wouldn’t want his friends to think you two are dating. Word might get around, and that would make it more difficult for him to date other women.
  6. You’re never invited to family functions. No matter how long you two have been “dating,” you never get invited to family things. That’s something just for girlfriends, and he wouldn’t want you, or his family members, to get the wrong idea.
  7. He runs to you for support, but doesn’t return the favor. When he’s sad, lonely, or depressed, you’re the first one he runs to for comfort. He takes all of your support, but is nowhere to be found when you need someone to be there for you. Sharing his vulnerable side with you can trick you into feeling like you’re getting closer, when in reality, he’s just using you to make himself feel better.
  8. He blames everything on timing. Maybe you guys could be in a real relationship but, ugh, timing! It’s his get out of a relationship free card and he never gets tired of using it. The thing about love and timing is that it’s never actually perfect. If you really want to be with someone, you make it work.
  9. He refuses to define the relationship. He completely dodges all of your attempts to define what your relationship is. He won’t call you his girlfriend, but can’t call you a friend with benefits either. If he defines it as a casual relationship, you might start seeing other people and get off his hook. He doesn’t want that to happen, so he avoids a definition all together.
  10. He suddenly likes you more when another guy is interested. When you meet someone else and there’s a spark, hook guy swoops back in to make sure you don’t end up with someone else. He doesn’t care if you are happy, as long as he gets to keep you on the back burner.
Holly Harris is a freelance writer, full time student, and mommy to a toddler sass monster. In her (nearly nonexistent) free time, you can find her lifting something heavy in her home gym or chugging vodka sodas with friends. She contributes to several other sites, including Elite Daily.