How To Tell If You Like A Guy Or You’re Happy Just Being Friends

Nothing is more exciting than when you have a crush on someone and you get to build it all up in your head. You get to download with your friends and giggle about the latest love kernel that you can collect from your crush and use that to convince yourself you have a relationship with them. You might just think that you like them as a friend, but you keep wondering. What is the difference between friendship and a romantic relationship? Here’s where I step in to clarify. Here’s how to tell if you like him no more than a platonic level.

  1. You get butterflies. One excellent way to realize that you like a guy is to recognize how your body reacts to him. Are you excited when you get to hang out with him? In a way that feels different from when you meet up with your friends? That means you feel powerful when you think about him. You have a fundamental level of chemistry that most relationships would die for. You are highly attuned to his body and his touch. Things aren’t just physical, of course, but you’re in the right place.
  2. You feel comfortable. When you feel safe and comfortable, even in these early stages of a relationship, that’s a great sign. It’s a strong foundation for a strong relationship. You will be more likely to experiment and evolve together when you have that secure base to work from. That means you will grow as a person as well as together and that’s sustainable. It’s only when you attain comfort in a relationship that you look back on previous relationships and see how truly uncomfortable you were. Relationships aren’t just “like that.” The right person will make it happen.
  3. You don’t question your relationship. This doesn’t mean that you’re naive about the adult issues that face modern relationships. But you don’t linger on them. You have conversations and open up dialogues to express your feelings and stop things from bubbling over. But ultimately you don’t feel insecure. You don’t realize how much energy you waste stressing about your position in a relationship when you know you’re loved and valued. Understood.
  4. Your friends are jealous. This is always a great position to be in. Particularly if you don’t have a great history of relationship success. It’s wonderful to feel proud of your partner and yourself in a relationship. You put the work together and overcome all the hurdles and obstacles in your way. It’s only right that you should reap the rewards for that. Just don’t get too hung up on other people’s opinions and you’ll be grand. It’s a great ego boost, but make sure you don’t let that become a pressure to perform your relationship for other people. It’s a great way of knowing that you’re interested in a guy though when you want the approval of the people close to you.
  5. You love to boast about them. It’s so fabulous to feel enriched and challenged by your partner. When you are interested in someone you don’t want to stop talking about them. They are endlessly interesting and yield new conversations and insights into their past. It’s a strong indicator that you like them and they’re right for you.
  6. Your parents love them. Because they know how important they are to you. Clearly, you make them happy and they love you for it. You will feel part of the family, or want to be.
  7. You plan for a future together. When you find the right person, it will make all the sense in the world. You won’t sacrifice any moment with the right person. That’s different in friendship versus in a relationship. Sometimes you just need someone to tell you.
  8. You ask him about his past. As much as you want to be part of his future, you also care deeply about his past. You will forge a great relationship with his parents and siblings because of this. It’s a great bonding opportunity. When they relax into their hometown and embrace the nostalgia you get to be a part of his best memories. You’re also committing to making new ones together. That’s a huge indicator that you like him in a way that’s more than just friendship.

Take all these hints with a pinch of salt, but get ready to erase your arbitrary dating criteria and take that leap of faith.

Hannah has a Masters degree in Romantic and Victorian literature in Scotland and spends her spare time writing anything from essays to short fiction about the life and times of the frogs in her local pond! She loves musical theatre, football, anything with potatoes, and remains a firm believer that most of the problems in this world can be solved by dancing around the kitchen to ABBA. You can find her on Instagram at @_hannahvic.
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