If you love kids and want at least one or two of your own, it’s important to find a man that is going to make a good dad. He doesn’t have to be perfect because no one is. However, you do want someone who’s going to be focused, dedicated, and mature enough to raise little people well. While there are no guarantees, there are some qualities you can look for to know if he is going to make a good dad someday.
- He does household chores. Whether you live together or he lives with roommates or by himself, he has to know how to clean up after himself and keep his living space tidy. A good percentage of parenting is cleaning up. If he can’t be bothered to do his own dishes, he’s not likely to take care of the cleaning up that kids bring into your life! Does he do housework because someone nags at him or does he do it simply because it needs to be done?
- He knows how to play. He plays sports or games. Having a good time is why he plays. Laughing and goofing around is fun to kids. Playing doesn’t mean always winning, though. Kids won’t always win and it is important for them to have someone to teach them that whatever they are playing, having a good time is the main point of it. He can play a game and he doesn’t need to win.
- He can laugh off the little things. Spilled wine on the couch? Not a big deal. Dog scarfed down a bag of Cheetos? He doesn’t freak out. These are the kinds of little things that you need to get used to with kids. Accidents happen. Sometimes, as a parent, you just have to laugh it off. There’s no point in yelling or screaming about it. If he can laugh off small things, you know he won’t get too worked up when the 2-year-old barfs all over the back seat.
- He keeps his cool. If he flies off the handle a lot, you know he’s going to have a hard time handling dad life. Children do and say crazy things. Sometimes those crazy things are big things, too. They require a cool head. You need to know that if his daughter gets hit in the head with a ball at her softball game, he’s going to be able to stay calm and get her the medical care that she needs. There’s no time to freak out.
- He thinks about his future. If your guy is already putting money into savings and thinking about buying a house, you know he’s planning for a future with a family. Once children come along, there’s a lot of planning to do. Sports, college, and other events take thought. If he has no savings and doesn’t even know where his career is going, he might not be ready for parenthood.
- He takes care of a pet. If he has a dog, cat, or even tropical fish, does he take care of them? Does he take the dog to the vet for regular checkups and shots? Does he make sure the temperature of the fish tank water is right for his fish? If he never thinks about these things at all and assumes that everything will work itself out, you might want to reconsider having kids with him. Dads need to take initiative to think about the well-being of their children.
- He isn’t a pushover. A man that stands up for himself and for you will do what it takes to protect his children too. Ask yourself if he lets people walk all over him, demanding his time and energy with him getting very little in return. If he does, your children will likely do the same. Kids have a way of manipulating parents so they can get their own way. You want to know that he will not cave and go with the easiest solution all the time.
- He has hobbies. Hobbies may not seem like a big deal when you are considering whether or not your boyfriend will make a wonderful dad, but they can say a lot. Hobbies mean he won’t be sitting around in front of the TV or his computer all day long. He’ll be busy. Your children will learn that activities are a normal part of life. The TV isn’t meant to be all-day entertainment. Your boyfriend will probably involve your kids in his hobbies and they’ll learn skills. At the very least, they’l learn to explore life and try hobbies of their own.
If you’re thinking of a long-term future with your boyfriend and you want to have children, start thinking about what kind of dad he will make now. Choose well and you’ll get a partner for life that will take part in all aspects of the family. If you don’t pay attention, you could end up with an overgrown child to add to the children you have together.
