How You Behaved When I Walked Away Just Confirmed My Decision

I never really understood the concept of someone having their world ripped out from under them — not until I watched you unravel at my feet the day I walked away. The thing is, your determination to make me change my mind only proved to me that I’d made the right choice to go.

  1. We were toxic. After years of not seeing our relationship for what it was, the rose-colored glasses finally came off. You were abusive, controlling, manipulative, and you treated me like crap. I finally realized that you were never going to be the man that I deserved. As much as I hate to admit it, you reduced me to a shell of a person. I hadn’t done anything to deserve it — it was all because of your own insecurities.
  2. You always took me for granted. I wasn’t perfect but I was a great girlfriend, an understanding partner, and a loyal friend. I put everything I had into making us work while you just stood there and rode the waves. When I finally called you out on your behavior, of course, you didn’t see the wrongs I was trying to make right. All you saw was me robbing you of a future you always thought you were entitled to but somehow never realized you actually needed to work to earn.
  3. I stood my ground.After weeks of building up the courage, I knew what I had to do. On the day that you thought we would start a new chapter, I closed the entire book instead. I said my piece, I held my head high and I prayed that you would actually listen to what I was saying. Of course, everything went in one ear and out the other, and all you could do was desperately try to make me change my mind. It didn’t work, obviously.
  4. Playing the victim was always your strong suit. You instantly went from predator to prey, turning everything I said back on me. You promised that things would be different. You begged me to give you a chance to change. You insisted that you wouldn’t take me for granted anymore, as if I hadn’t heard all those things before and as if I hadn’t already given you more than enough time to show me that you could be a better man.
  5. I gave you a chance to respect my wishes. When the conversation was over, I asked you to give me space and told you not to contact me anymore. It only took minutes after driving away for my phone to start ringing. When I blocked your number, you started calling my friends, showing up at my door, and leaving me notes where I could find them. You were trying to prove that you were fighting for me but all you were actually doing was pushing me even further away.
  6. Everything you did only gave me more ammunition. Your unwillingness to listen to what I was saying or to give any thought to my needs is exactly why I left you. Your insistence that I was making a mistake at a time when I’d never been more sure about anything was the exact confirmation I needed. You couldn’t seem to grasp that the more you tried to cling to me, the more I wanted to get from you. Every word that came out of your mouth on that day and during the weeks that followed only solidified my choice and made it that much easier to move on.
  7. Maybe it could have been different.Looking back, I wonder if you’d have handled it all differently if you’d seen it coming. I do wish I’d realized the truth about our relationship sooner instead of it hitting me in the face like a freight train the way it did. It’s not that you deserved advance notice after what you put me through, but maybe it would have softened the blow. Figures, even after all you did to me, that I’m still looking out for you like I always was. But who was looking out for me? The answer is no one — at least not until I got the strength to walk away.
  8. There are two sides to every story.I’m sure when you told people about the breakup, you painted me as the bad guy. Maybe you made up some crazy story and told countless lies, or maybe you told people the truth, did some soul searching, and realized the error of your ways. I don’t care. All I know is that the day I left you will likely go down as one of the worst of your life, at least for a while. Still, I have to admit, it was one of the most empowering of mine.
We only have one chance to live this life and I'm making the most of it. I'll make plenty of mistakes along the way but each one will send me further down the right path.