Breakups can feel both mentally and physically painful. In fact, there are studies showing that the same parts of the brain activated by physical pain are seen when people experience emotional pain. You may wonder if you’ll ever feel “yourself” again. But getting over a breakup is possible, even if it takes longer than you’d hope. When you start seeing the signs, you’ll notice a more confident and healed version of yourself.
- You feel ready to date other people again. Starting to feel like downloading a dating app is actually possible? You could be ready to get back into dating and finding the one right for you. But if at any point you feel sad or overwhelmed again, give yourself a break and time to reset.
- Your moods are more stabilized. You don’t feel like riding the world’s worst emotional rollercoaster anymore. That’s amazing! While you may still cry every once in a while or feel resentment towards your ex, you really feel like you are back on a regular mood schedule. A few good breakup songs can help get out the extra emotions. It takes a while to get over your ex after a breakup, but once you do, you end up feeling a lot more even-keeled.
- You no longer stalk their social media. When you don’t feel the need to obsessively check their social media accounts, you’re well on your way to recovery. Normalizing the fact that they are no longer in your life without having to “check in” once every day. Or more, whatever number that may be.
- You’re getting flirty again. I’m not talking about one-night stands necessarily. Even light flirting at the bar to boost your confidence is a good sign that you’re pulling the pieces back together and may be ready for another romance in the future. But if you’re not, flirting is still pretty fun. Once you get over your breakup, you’ll realize that you’re single and definitely ready to mingle.
- Seeing them date other people doesn’t make you upset. If you heard your ex has starting dating again or you happen to see them while swiping on your own time, an unhealed version of yourself might fly off the handle. But if you feel indifferent or happy over seeing that your ex has moved on, that probably means you have too.
- When you can look back on your relationship with clarity. After the breakup, you may have thought you lost the best thing that ever happened to you. But as time moves forward and you start being more honest with yourself, you can see all the big and little things that caused the breakup in the first place. It becomes more obvious as to how you’re incompatible.
More benefits you’ll experience when you get over your breakup
- You feel more confident about yourself. If you had a relationship that included put-downs and other sorts of verbal abuse, you may struggle with recovering from that. But when you have, the old insecurities that haunted you during or after your previous relationship have been replaced with a matured version of yourself. You’re now the kind of person who can see your imperfections and be okay with them. They weren’t the downfall of your previous relationship. Instead, they’re your superpower. The right person will see those imperfections and know that you’re the right person to be with.
- You understand that both you and your ex are human. When you finally get over your breakup, you can get through the day without thinking of your former S.O. as the Devil or some greater evil. As it turns out, you aren’t the hero or the villain of the story. Instead, you’re able to evaluate the ups and downs of your relationship. You can acknowledge what you both did right and wrong.
- You’ve grown as a person. There’s a reason why the term “growing pains” exists. Some of our hardest times in life teach the most valuable lessons. Breakups are no exception. You know what contributed to the death of the relationship and know what to look out for in the future. Seeing red flags isn’t as difficult as it used to be. Growth is essential in life, and healing from a breakup has many opportunities for growth.
- You’re looking forward as opposed to looking back. Instead of wallowing in the past and what could have been, you’re excited about what the next steps are in life. Ready to buy a house? Maybe move to a new city or state? You don’t think about the “what-ifs” anymore. You’re ready to embrace something (or someone) else new.
- Setbacks are normal but they don’t overwhelm you You won’t magically recover from your breakup overnight. Months later, you may still feel sadness or resentment over your relationship. It isn’t unusual to occasionally feel like you’re better only to feel a lot worse the day after. But if you’re having setbacks, it doesn’t mean you’re not healing. Actually, it’s a big step towards healing.
- You’ve willingly distanced yourself from your ex. Have you been able to establish no contact with your ex and haven’t broken it in recent weeks? Congrats, you’re on the upswing! Distance is healthy when recovering from a broken relationship. Even if you miss them dearly, you know that talking to them will only make the pain worse. When you finally get over your breakup, you’ll know for sure that you’re better off without them.