My Husband & I Stayed Up Late Chatting On Our Honeymoon & It Was More Intimate Than Sex

Before getting married, my husband and I were already together for five years with no breaks in between. I thought I already knew every part of him, good and bad, but our connection reached a whole new level of intimacy that even sex couldn’t achieve when we stayed up late talking one night on our honeymoon.

  1. We stayed in a shepherd’s hut without technology, which was refreshing in and of itself. In this day and age, it’s difficult to stay away from technology. It constantly surrounds us and everywhere we turn, people have their heads buried in a screen, gathering new bits of information. While this isn’t necessarily always a bad thing, phones and TV can certainly take away from a relationship and put barriers between people. For our honeymoon, my husband and I stayed out on a farm with poor reception, and being away from the distractions of social media made a difference in how we communicated.
  2. We were in a foreign country. Being somewhere unfamiliar and away from all of our friends and family left us with no one but each other to rely on. My husband and I decided to spend our honeymoon exploring Scotland, so our days were dedicated to sightseeing and our nights were meant for only each other. During those nights, we were completely alone, which meant we had to find interesting topics to keep each other entertained.
  3. We kept the conversation going and the wine flowing. While we by no means need to get drunk to be around each other, since it was our honeymoon, we decided to grab some wine and champagne. It’s no secret that alcohol loosens people up, and this was certainly the case for us. With bottomless glasses and a sweet buzz, everything under the sun became a topic of conversation and we were laughing non-stop.
  4. Our conversation was completely unfiltered. Sometimes couples don’t always share all of their thoughts and feelings out of fear of hurting their partner’s feelings or being misinterpreted. That night, we talked without a filter and didn’t take anything personally. It’s not as if we started digging into each other’s tiny flaws—when I say that we were unfiltered, I mean we said anything that popped into our heads without a second thought. Our mouths moved a little more carelessly because no topic felt off limits. We were already completely comfortable around one another, but we reached a whole new level of closeness that night.
  5. We shared details we had rarely, if ever, spoken aloud. We’ve talked about our past before, but sometimes there are aspects of our lives that aren’t shared simply because they’ve been blocked out or forgotten for years. Our past was brought up in a way that never comes up naturally in everyday conversations and we ended up sharing so many stories that we’d never told before. Not everything in life is comfortable, but sometimes it’s those hardships that can bring people closer together.
  6. We got real and deep. Yes, that was an intentional sex reference, but it’s also incredibly accurate. I’d gotten to know my husband well over the five years we dated before marriage, but every relationship that lasts gets past the getting-to-know phase. Once that threshold is crossed, the deep convos become few and far between because you’ve already shared all the major parts of our life. It was good to return to that phase, even temporarily.
  7. I gained a new-found understanding of my BFF. That night, I got to know my husband in a whole new light. We both knew less than a month into our relationship that we wanted to be together for life, but people change over the years. I’m not the same person I was when we first met and neither is he. Talking for hours without a movie in the background, without our phones by our side, and away from all our obligations allowed us to reconnect. In a way, we got to know each other all over again.
  8. We always have sex, but now I have a memory I’ll always cherish. Since we’ve been together for several years, we’ve had sex more times than I can remember. Not to say there haven’t been memorable times because there definitely have, but the sex will be there until our bodies give out. However, that one night on our honeymoon in Scotland was once in a lifetime and it’s a memory that can never be replaced. I’ll always remember that night that we shared our souls, cried over long-forgotten memories, and laughed so hard wine came out our nose.
Emily is a freelance writer living in Tennessee. She received her degree in journalism from Middle Tennessee State University. In her free time, she enjoys playing Pokemon and cuddling her two cats. Follow her on Instagram at @nillacat