I Keep My Childhood Friend Around As My Backup Plan

I’m one of those girls who has a timeline for everything; When I want to be at the top of my career, when I want to buy my first home and also when I want to get married. The ups and downs of relationships through my late teens and early twenties always made me make a conscious decision to have a backup plan just in case I didn’t find ‘the one’ by 35. I know 35 is still young, but I like to achieve my goals as much as possible. Plus, the older you become, the more your prospects lessen, so a backup plan is a must!

  1. We come from similar backgrounds. Everything is easier because he understands my values, upbringing, my family life and I don’t have to explain why I do things a certain way because he was brought up the same way within similar circles. So, if by 35 I haven’t found a guy to settle down with, we can skip straight to the good stuff of seeing if a romantic connection is something that can materialize between us with time.
  2. I like his personality. We get along so well. He’s funny, charismatic, charming and is confident within himself. We have always had a good friendship and enjoy time hanging out together. But I guess given that we’ve grown up together, I always kept him at arm’s’ length when it came to romance.
  3. My family loves him. He has good relationships with my mum, dad, and siblings and he charmed his way into their hearts. They always ask how he is doing when I visit home and are always wanting me to invite him over. When a guy can get along with your family, it’s hard not to think of them as a quality person.
  4. He is great with kids. Having some shared family gatherings, I have seen him with nephews and nieces, and he is terrific with them. They love hanging out with him, and I even think they consider him as a cool uncle. It’s one thing when someone tells you sure I like kids. It’s a different thing when you see it for yourself. Plus, he has mentioned that he wants kids in his future, so that fits in well with my goal of having kids with my future husband.
  5. We are friends. He was the first guy friend I ever had, and we clicked instantly! We were always getting into trouble together and having many first together as we grew up. Even though I always dated outside my circle when we reached our teens, he never stopped being a friend, and he was still so sweet to me. Now and then we’ll check in with each other to stay in the loop of what’s happening in each other’s lives. So I guess he’s a good backup plan because we have a solid friendship to build on.
  6. He has his shit together. There’s nothing more endearing than a guy who is in charge of his own life. Master of his own destiny. Going places. He has done well in his career, risen up the corporate ladder, made some savvy investments, he’s on the right path to a secure and wealthy future.
  7. He is loyal. Ever since we were kids, he always had my back even when we got into trouble. He would never tell on me. We used to have that understanding where things remained between us, and if went down, we would go down together. I always liked that about him. He’s never disappointed me on that front. In this day and age where cheating has become so prevalent, having someone loyal is priceless.
  8. He is a great cook. They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, but the way to my heart is also through my stomach. Having a guy who can cook is an excellent quality and very attractive. Every time I have visited him I have always left with a happy and healthy belly. If we end up together, I can have that for the rest of my life.
  9. He knows how to let loose to have a good time. Nobody likes a guy who takes his life too seriously. My childhood friend knows how to work harder and play even harder! I’ve always admired that about him. He takes the time to have great experiences with friends, family and make unforgettable memories. It not only gives him life balance but makes him an interesting, well-rounded person who you can always learn something new from and have fun with.
Hannah is a twenty-something-year-old freelance writer, obsessed with reality TV, and all things sweet.