I Love Sex, But That Doesn’t Make Me Promiscuous

While I’m certainly no prude, there are a few terms I absolutely just cannot stand – and sl*t is one of them. Besides the ever-present girl-on-girl crime it provokes, the word in and of itself carries nothing but negative connotations. Calling someone a sl*t can only mean one thing – she sleeps around. But why is that a bad thing?

  1. It’s none of your business. If it’s not your life, then keep your nose out of it. Getting involved in someone else’s business, especially their sex life, speaks volumes about you rather than the person you’re talking crap about.
  2. It’s sex, not the end of the world. It’s 2016, not 1950, so why are we still so hung up over sex? It’s fun, it feels good, and if you’re taking precautions, it’s hurting no one. What’s the big deal?
  3. I do whatever I want, whenever I want. Being called a sl*t implies that I’m reckless and don’t have my act together. Much to haters’ dismay, the truth is, I’m crushing life in all aspects – I’ve got financial stability, great friends, an amazing career, etc. There’s really no merit in trying to demean me because I enjoy sex. Independence is freedom, and no one can take that from me.
  4. I really don’t give a damn what anyone thinks of me. When it comes down to it, I really don’t care what others think of me. Sure, we all want a shining reputation, but the thing is, if someone else is going to judge your actions when they don’t even involve them in the first place, there’s no point in losing sleep over it. The best part about being an adult is getting to do whatever TF you want. So ladies, go ahead and seize that MF day.
  5. If you want to be judgmental, I don’t want to be your friend. Sure, I want my friends’ advice about my relationships… when I actually ask them. I respect everyone’s ability to make their own decisions when it comes to who to sleep with and who not to, so my friends should do the same — unless, of course, they don’t want to be friends anymore.
  6. I have a lot more to offer than sex. Anyone who calls me a sl*t doesn’t actually know what’s happening behind closed doors, so how can they be absolutely certain that I’m the kind of person you think I am? Maybe you think I’m a sl*t because I have different guys over from time to time. Ever consider the possibility that I’m just providing a couch to a friend in need? Or hell, maybe I am sleeping with a different guy every night. Maybe we’re having meaningful conversations, which are no doubt much deeper than the conversations you’re having about me, the “sl*t.”
  7. I do things that make me feel good, and I’m not sorry. Treating yourself well is important, and no, I’m not talking about purely self-indulgent behavior here, either. Of course, everyone’s got to be aware of their surroundings, and should behave in a way that doesn’t hurt others, at least not intentionally. But if I want to have sex for the right reasons — which are whatever I say they are — then I’m going to go for it. It’s my life, and there’s absolutely no reason to hold back.
Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia