I’d Like To Forgive You For Breaking My Heart But You Don’t Deserve It

I’d Like To Forgive You For Breaking My Heart But You Don’t Deserve It ©iStock/Balono

I want to be the better person. I want to take the high road. I want to forgive you for everything you put me through so we can both move on. There’s just one thing: you don’t deserve it.

  1. There was no reason for you to hurt me. I can’t understand why you did what you did. If I could comprehend it, then I might be able to live with it. But I just can’t justify your actions, which means I can’t forgive you. Not yet.
  2. It’s too fresh in my mind. Maybe in the future I’ll be able to look back on our relationship without crying. But right now, my heart still stings. I can’t think about you without wanting to take a baseball bat to your car, because I’m foolish enough to still care about you and wish things would’ve ended differently.
  3. Niceness didn’t get me anywhere with you. When we were together, I was the sweetest girl in the world, and look where that got me. You clearly don’t appreciate kindness, so why should I extend an olive branch to you now that we’re over? It would be a waste of my time.
  4. You get what you give. You can’t blame me for being mad at you. If you treat other people like crap, then you’re going to be treated like crap, too. It’s the way the world works, and if you don’t like it, you should adjust your attitude.
  5. I want karma to come back around. I don’t want you to come down with an incurable illness. I just want you to go through the type of heartbreak you put me through. It’s only fair.
  6. You knew exactly what you were doing. You didn’t break my heart on accident. You purposely lied to me and led me on. There’s no way I’m going to forgive you for deliberately manipulating me, because it was a douchebag move.
  7. You don’t give a crap about me. It’s not like you’re waiting for my blessing to move on with your life. I’m sure you’ve already forgotten about me, so what’s the difference if I refuse to wish you well? I’m only hurting myself by being bitter.
  8. I believe in “an eye for an eye.” Ever since you hurt me, I haven’t been doing all that well, so why should you get to live your happily ever after? You were the one who did something wrong. If I’m in pain, you should be in pain, too.
  9. I’ll play the part of the supportive ex. I’m not a monster. I’ll act like I’m wishing you well when I run into you in public, because it’s the right thing to do. But deep down, I’ll hope you’ve been staying up nights, crying over me.
  10. I don’t know why I still care about you. In fact, I’m ready to forget about you. I’m not going to wish you well or wish you ill. I’m just going to wish that you’ll be erased from my mind, so I never have to think about you again.
Holly Riordan is a writer from Long Island, New York who has authored several science fiction and horror books. A graduate of Stony Brook University, she has spent nearly a decade writing for publications including Thought Catalog, Huffington Post, Teen Vogue, and more. You can find her on Instagram @hollyrio and Twitter @hollyyrio.