We all want to believe the best in people, but sometimes our gut tells us something’s off.
If you’re noticing these traits in a guy, it might be time to trust your instincts and proceed with caution. Remember, one or two of these doesn’t automatically make someone untrustworthy, but if you’re seeing a pattern, it’s worth paying attention to.
1. He’s always got an excuse ready.
If he’s got more excuses than a kid who didn’t do his homework, watch out. Trustworthy people take responsibility for their actions, not constantly pass the buck.
2. He’s super charming… all the time.
Don’t get me wrong, charm can be great. But if he’s laying it on thick 24/7, it might be a cover for less savory traits. Real people have off days; constant charm often masks insincerity, Psychology Today warns.
3. He’s vague about his past.
We all have things we’d rather not discuss, but if he’s consistently dodgy about his history, that’s a red flag. Trustworthy people are generally open about their past, even the parts they’re not proud of.
4. He’s got different versions of himself for different people.
If he’s a chameleon, changing his personality depending on who he’s with, that’s concerning. It shows a lack of authenticity and suggests he might be hiding his true self.
5. He makes promises he can’t keep.
Actions speak louder than words. If he’s all talk and no follow-through, that’s a clear sign he can’t be trusted. Reliable people are careful about making promises they can actually keep.
6. He’s overly defensive when questioned.
If simple questions make him react like he’s being interrogated, something’s up. Trustworthy people are generally open to explaining themselves without getting their back up.
7. He’s secretive about his phone or social media.
While everyone deserves privacy, extreme secrecy about digital life often hints at hidden agendas. If he freaks out when you glance at his phone, ask yourself why.
8. He badmouths his exes.
How he talks about past relationships says a lot. If all his exes are “crazy” or “psycho,” chances are he’s not taking responsibility for his part in those relationships.
9. He’s always the victim in his stories.
If nothing’s ever his fault and the world’s always out to get him, be wary. Trustworthy people can admit when they’ve messed up and don’t constantly play the victim card.
10. He’s inconsistent in his stories.
Pay attention if details keep changing or if his stories don’t quite add up. Trustworthy people generally have consistent narratives because they’re telling the truth.
11. He pushes your boundaries.
If he’s constantly testing your limits or trying to get you to do things you’re not comfortable with, that’s a huge red flag. Trustworthy people respect boundaries, period.
12. He’s overly jealous or possessive.
A little jealousy can be normal, but if he’s constantly accusing you of things or trying to control who you see, that’s not trustworthy behavior. It often stems from his own insecurities or infidelities.
13. He lies about small, unnecessary things.
White lies might seem harmless, but they show a comfort with dishonesty. If he’s willing to lie about little things, what else might he be lying about?
14. He’s got a Jekyll and Hyde personality.
If his mood swings are giving you whiplash, be cautious. Trustworthy people are generally consistent in their behavior, not flip-flopping between extremes.
15. He tries to isolate you from friends and family.
If he’s always got a reason why you shouldn’t see your loved ones, that’s concerning. Trustworthy partners encourage healthy relationships with others, not try to monopolize your time and attention.
16. He can’t handle criticism.
If he blows up or shuts down at the slightest hint of criticism, that’s a bad sign. Trustworthy people can take feedback and are willing to work on themselves. As Inc. explains, an inability to accept feedback in this way also points to a lack of emotional intelligence.
17. He’s got a track record of cheating.
Past behavior is often the best predictor of future behavior. If he’s cheated before and shows no remorse or understanding of why it was wrong, chances are he’ll do it again.
