When you’re a strong woman with high self-esteem, it can be tough to find the kind of relationship you deserve. So often, when you’re dating someone, you’ll feel like they’re not giving you everything you need and want. If you have the nagging feeling that you’re settling, this is why you shouldn’t be worried about raising your standards:
- Pay attention to your gut. Do you ever get that feeling deep down that you’re not getting the kind of treatment you deserve? Yeah, you shouldn’t be ignoring that. Our heads might get caught up in logic, and our hearts might get caught up in love, but that feeling in your belly is the real deal. If it’s telling you that you can do better, you should hear it out.
- You’re worth more than you think you are. If you always feel like your friends and family think way higher of you than they should, you’re not alone. Even when we’re good about loving ourselves, we often underestimate just how much we bring to the table. So if you even think that maybe you could do better than the relationship you’re in, you’re probably way more correct than you could have ever believed.
- You should never settle. There is literally no reason to be in a relationship that isn’t making you completely happy. We get to choose the people we want to spend our time with, so why would you actively decide to be with someone you doubt is giving you what you deserve? Rather than sitting there questioning yourself, it’s much better to take the risk and either talk it out with your partner or find someone else who will give you what you need.
- A truly happy relationship won’t fill you with doubt. When we’re with someone who makes us feel whole, we don’t question if things might be better elsewhere — we’re just happy to live in the moment with this person who makes us so happy. Should you feel doubts creeping in telling you that you need to raise your standards and get away from this guy, it’s probably because your relationship isn’t actually as fulfilling as you’d thought.
- You shouldn’t be scared to aim higher. People will try to cut you down and say your expectations are too high. Don’t listen to them. There’s nothing wrong with realizing that the person you’re with is dragging you down and deciding to search for someone who would build you up instead. The worst thing that can happen is you spend a while longer looking for someone who will meet your standards… and in the end, it’ll be so worth it.
- Good partners try to go above and beyond for each other. In other words, if this guy isn’t going at least a little bit out of his way to make you happy, it’s probably why you feel like you’re worth more than you’re getting. If putting forth more than bare-minimum effort and not getting the same in return, then no wonder you’re feeling like something’s not right. Get out there and find someone who wants to give as much as he’s getting.
- Knowing what you deserve doesn’t make you entitled. It’s true that nobody owes you anything, but that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t pursue a relationship worthy of who you are. You’re not spoiled or a brat for wanting to be with someone who makes you feel as awesome as you know you are.
- A good partner will make you realize your self-worth, not question it. He’s going to make you feel like his equal, and he’s going to treat you as he wants to be treated. When you’re with the right person, you’re never going to wonder if there’s someone out there who could love you better. But when you’re with someone who doesn’t value you as much as he should, it should be no surprise when you start questioning if this is really as good as it gets.
- .You know what you bring to a relationship. Don’t let someone convince you that you’re not worth the effort when you’ve been told time and time again what an awesome girlfriend you are. If you’re giving it your all in a relationship, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be receiving it from the other person involved.
- Your heart knows when it’s not being treated right. That pain you feel isn’t you being overly sensitive; it’s you knowing that whatever is going on in your current relationship just isn’t doing it for you. It’s easy to convince yourself that you’re being irrational by thinking you deserve more than you’re getting, but when your heart is aching for something else, your happiness depends on you listening to it.
