If This Is Modern Dating, Then I’m Seriously Out

No one said dating would be easy but man, I really didn’t expect it to be this hard. No matter how hard I try to keep hope alive,  Prince Charming is absolutely nowhere to be found — trust me, I’ve looked. When so many of the guys I run into are absolute jerk
s, I’m starting to feel like I’m better off alone.

  1. I don’t want to put up with any more BS. I’m done with eating a bowl full of lies for breakfast every morning. I’m over all the games. I don’t want to wonder where a guy is at any given time, what he’s doing, if he’s being faithful or even if he’s going to call. I don’t have time for any more men with excuses. I don’t need that stress in my life.
  2. Where are all the good guys hiding? People keep saying that not all the good guys are taken, but if that’s true, then where the hell are they? I keep looking, but the good guys are nowhere to be found. Instead, I keep running into way too many liars, cheaters, and overall douchebags and my patience is wearing thin.
  3. I love myself, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want someone else to love me too. Self-love will always be most important. I can take care of myself. I might be alone, but I’m not desperate. I’m perfectly content being all on my own… it’d just be nice to have the love of a good guy too. Is that too much to ask?
  4. I don’t need a man to make me happy. I’m not some damsel in distress. I’m not locked up in a tower waiting for some man to slay my demons and save me. I can save myself and I can find my own happiness. No man can make me happy, that job is up to me. I’ve always felt this way, but after all the bad experiences I’ve had with guys, that feeling has only been reinforced.
  5. WTF has happened to dating? What happened to the days of chivalry and courtship? What happened to the men that actually wanted to find love? Nowadays it seems like every guy I meet is a player and has no desire to be in a committed relationship. This game used to be fair, but now all the men play dirty — at least all the ones I’m meeting.
  6. I can handle my own orgasm. Finding someone to have sex with isn’t a problem, but I’m not interested in being a booty call. Dating has become way too casual, and I’m a serious kind of girl. Men may think women need them for sex, but I certainly don’t. I can get by just fine (probably even better) on my own.
  7. Guys aren’t even trying to be boyfriend material. In fact, they don’t even want to be boyfriends at all. They know that they can pretty easily find a woman willing to settle for what little they’re offering so they don’t bother to offer anything more. It’s absolutely infuriating.
  8. I don’t want to live on someone else’s terms. I can be a guy’s girlfriend if I agree to give him space, have sex whenever he wants and don’t expect him to text me back within a reasonable amount of time. Oh boy, what a deal! I’d better jump on that before someone else grabs this prize up. Guys want to hold all the cards but that’s not how real relationships work — at least not in my life.
  9. I’m sick of wasting my time. I’ve spent so much time trying to sort the good from the bad. I’ve been played, cheated on and had my heart irrevocably broken, and I’m sick of it. I’d rather be alone than go through any more of this BS and heartbreak. If a guy isn’t open to something real from the beginning, I’d rather be left alone.
  10. I really am better off single than with this lot. I have an incredibly fulfilling life and I’m already a complete person, so I’m just looking for a guy who can compliment what I already have. I’ve wasted a lot of time on guys who just weren’t worth the effort. I hope my Mr. Right is out there, but in case he’s not, being single is so much better than being with a guy who doesn’t really give a crap.
  11. If this is modern dating then I’m officially out. Ghosting, benching, catfishing, Tinder… is this really what modern dating looks like? It’s a digital world and every player is using that to his advantage. Breakups aren’t in person or sometimes don’t even take place at all. Men are free to disappear, randomly (and disgustingly) proposition and mislead me with no consequences? Screw that. I’ll stay single.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.