If You Have A Crush On Me, Just Tell Me — You Don’t Have Any Competition

I’m not ashamed to say that I’m seriously single. To be totally honest, I’m cool with that most of the time. However, I am only human and I do want someone to tell me I’m cute and bring me ice cream when I have my period sometimes. I’ve been on my own for about a year now, which is what I want to send a message to all single guys out there: if you have a crush on me, tell me straight up. Believe me, you have a good chance!

  1. I’ve had guys play coy before. On more than one occasion, I’ve actually had guys admit to me months or even years after the fact that they had a crush on me previously but that they never said anything about it because they thought I wouldn’t be interested or that I must have already been in a relationship. On all of those occasions, neither was particularly true. I would have given them all a chance, but it’s always too little too late.
  2. My standards aren’t unreasonable. Because I’m a strong woman who won’t take any sh-t, I have standards and boundaries that I refuse to compromise on. However, they’re not unreasonable by any means. I want someone who respects me, shows me courtesy and consideration, and who puts in as much effort as I do. Beyond that, I’m open to getting to know all different kinds of guys, so if you have a crush on me, step on up!
  3. I don’t have the energy to play games. Just like I don’t play hard to get or expect men to chase me, I don’t want that dynamic in return either. I believe in direct communication, which means that if a guy has feelings for me or think he might like to go on a date with me, he should just say so. If I’m not interested, I’ll say that upfront too. However, given that I find it really attractive when a guy knows what he wants and goes for it, chances are I probably won’t say no to at least one date. If you have a crush on me, ask me out!
  4. I’m not a mind reader. Seriously, dude — if you’re harboring some intense crush on me, I’m not going to magically know that by engaging my psychic powers. I’m going to need you to show that so I can respond to it. Also, the “hints” you drop shouldn’t be too subtle. I don’t want to have to guess whether I’m reading into things too much or if you really like me.
  5. Guys aren’t falling at my feet on a daily basis. When guys have told me in the past that they assumed I must be in a relationship, I’m not sure if they legitimately meant that as a compliment or if they were just using that as a copout for their lack of effort in showing interest. Regardless, let me say here and now, guys: you don’t have any competition at the moment, so please do go for it.
  6. I’m not desperate, by the way. By imploring men to just tell me they like me straight-up, I don’t want to misrepresent things. While I want guys to be more upfront with their feelings, I’m also not really bothered if they don’t — more like annoyed. I’m really comfortable being single and I love my life, so if a guy has a crush on me and never says anything about it, that really is his loss. Your move, guys. Got a crush on me? Say it!
Jennifer Still is a writer and editor with more than 10 years of experience. The managing editor of Bolde, she has bylines in Vanity Fair, Business Insider, The New York Times, Glamour, Bon Appetit, and many more. You can follow her on Twitter @jenniferlstill
close-link
close-link
close-link
close-link