We all know someone who shares way too much information. If you’re the type who lays it all out there—no filters or boundaries—it might be time to hit pause. Oversharing can make people uncomfortable, and your “TMI” might unintentionally push people away. Here are 15 behaviors that signal you should be more selective when speaking.
1. You Spill Your Life Story Within Minutes of Meeting Someone
If you find yourself sharing your deepest secrets with someone you just met, that’s not a good sign. People need time to connect, get to know you, and build trust. Dropping your entire life story on them too soon can feel overwhelming. You might be trying to be open, but they might think something is wrong with you.
2. You Vent to People Who Don’t Want to Know
We all need to vent but choose your targets. Venting to people who don’t really know you yet can be off-putting. If your first conversation with someone turns into a therapy session about your ex, job, or family drama, it’s probably more than they were ready for or can handle.
3. You Share Every Random, Boring Detail of Your Day
You’re acting like an energy vampire if you constantly give people play-by-play updates on your life without them asking. Some people may love hearing about your latest adventure, but others might feel exhausted by a daily diary entry about every meal, task, or random thought that pops into your head.
4. You Drop Personal Bombs at Inappropriate Times
Timing is everything when it comes to sharing something deeply personal. If you’re dropping heavy or super personal info while hanging out casually with friends, at work, or in any setting where the mood doesn’t call for it, you are making others feel awkward.
5. You Over-Explain Everything
It’s one thing to tell a story, but you don’t always need to go into excessive detail. If you’re constantly over-explaining everything—like why you were late or didn’t text back—you’ll lose your audience’s interest fast (and maybe even a few friends). People can only handle so much detail before they check out.
6. You Discuss Your Problems with Anyone and Everyone
Know the difference between close friends and acquaintances. If you share your emotional baggage with someone you’re not close to, they will find it strange and uncomfortable. Deep, personal conversations are better saved for those you can trust in your inner circle.
7. You Don’t Know How to Read the Room
If people look away, change the subject, or give short responses when you’re oversharing, read the signs (and the room). If people aren’t engaging, it’s time to shift gears, tone things down a bit, and maybe keep some things to yourself.
8. You Use Social Media as Your Therapist
Social media is a double-edged sword. It’s a great way to share your life, but people may question your mental state if you’re constantly posting about every argument, heartbreak, or bad day. Oversharing online can make others uncomfortable, and they may think twice about how they engage with you.
9. You Turn Casual Chats into Therapy Sessions
You are oversharing if a lighthearted conversation turns into you unloading your deepest emotional issues. Talking about your feelings is great, but not every chat needs to dive into your innermost struggles. And not every person wants to hear them.
10. You Overshare Other’s Secrets Too
You’ve crossed a line if you share private details about your friends, family, or partner without their permission. People want to know their personal information is safe with you. If you spill their tea, they won’t trust you and might start rethinking the friendship.
11. You Drone on About Your Health
If every conversation ends up being about your latest doctor’s appointment or health scare, it can wear thin. People care about you, but if you’re constantly focusing on medical details when there’s nothing major going on, it can be tedious and burdensome for them.
12. You Dive Into Controversial Topics Too Soon
You’ve headed straight into oversharing territory if you talk politics, religion, or other controversial topics with someone you just met. People need time to get to know each other and size someone up before tackling deep or divisive subjects. Jumping into these conversations too quickly can make people feel uneasy or defensive.
13. You Share Intimate Relationship Details
Your romantic relationship is your business and totally off-limits. When you give people the complete breakdown of your latest fight or intimate details about your love life, it’s too much for them to handle and disrespectful to your partner. Sensitive topics are best shared with close confidants, not casual friends or coworkers.
14. You Don’t Notice When People Try to Change the Subject
If you’re not picking up on cues when people are trying to steer the conversation in a different direction, you’re so caught up in your own story and oversharing you’ve lost sight. When someone changes the subject, they’re trying to exit an uncomfortable conversation gracefully, so take the hint and follow their lead.
15. You Hijack Every Conversation
If every conversation circles back to you, your experiences, and your emotions, you’re not only oversharing but also self-indulgent. Relationships are a two-way street, and listening as much as talking is important. People will feel more connected to you if you show genuine interest in their lives and listen.
