I’m A Total Catch And I Know It, So Why Am I Still Single?

Society tends to think that if a person is single, they must have some huge flaw that stops them from finding a partner. So what happens when you’re a total catch with everything in the world going for you and you’re still single? Although this can seem like quite a pickle, there are actually many reasons why someone seems to always remain single, even when most people would love to be with them. Check out the possible reasons why you’re still flying solo below!

  1. You don’t want to compromise. All relationships require some form of compromise. If you are still single, it could be that you’re just not willing to meet anyone halfway. No matter how much of a catch you are, it’s near impossible to land a healthy relationship if everything has to be your way or the high way.
  2. You’re still in love with someone you can’t have. Still being in love with someone you’re not in a relationship with will almost always stop you from getting into a relationship with someone else. This is usually the case if you’re the one sabotaging your own budding romances most of the time. Even though you are physically available for a new relationship, you’re not emotionally available when your heart belongs to someone else.
  3. You’re not approachable. To work out why you’re still single when you don’t want to be, ask yourself where you seem to be having the most problems. Do you meet people easily enough but have trouble connecting later? Or can you not seem to meet anyone new right off the bat? If you fall into the latter category, it could be that you’re not very approachable. Think about how intimidating it is to walk up to a stranger and start chatting to them. That’s especially true if you think they’re attractive or interesting. You’ll draw people in more easily by using open body language and appearing friendly and talkative.
  4. You question your self-worth. This is oh-so clichéd. But it’s true—you will have a hard time finding a healthy relationship if you question your self-worth. On a deeper level, you might not be comfortable with someone showing you love if you don’t love yourself to begin with. But the real issue is that, if you don’t have a sense of self-worth, you’re likely to act in ways that repel quality romantic interests. You’re less likely to take care of yourself and provide pleasant company to the people around you. And then there’s the age-old question: if you don’t love yourself, why would anyone else love you?
  5. You don’t have time for a relationship. Many single people don’t realize that relationships actually take time. They don’t just magically happen! If you want it to work out with someone, you have to put time and effort into seeing them. You have to build a relationship from scratch, which can be an inconvenience. When you’re used to being single, this can even be a little confronting. If it feels like none of your relationships work out, there’s a chance that you just don’t have the time to make them work. The answer is to either change up your schedule or re-evaluate whether you really do want a real relationship.
  6. You come on too strong. One of the biggest killers of potential relationships is coming on too strong too early. When you start talking about the future, strong feelings, or making too many changes before the other person is even sure of how they feel, you risk scaring them off. This could be the reason why you’re still single if you’ve noticed that all your potential love interests ghost or break it off before things even get going.
  7. You’re waiting for perfection. Instagram has fooled a lot of people into thinking that they need to have perfection in every area of their lives, from work to relationships. The reality is that no person you find is going to be perfect. If you turn down every single potential flame, maybe your standards are unrealistic. That said, there’s nothing wrong with having high standards, as long as they’re possible. Know the difference between the two. High standards might be only dating someone who has a good job. Unrealistic standards are only dating Harry Styles.
  8. You’re letting fear hold you back. Fear can hold you back in a lot of areas of life, and relationships are no different. The majority of people seem to fear being alone the most. But it’s possible that you’re actually scared of being in a relationship. Maybe you’ve experienced traumatic relationships in the past and you’re scared of history repeating itself. Or perhaps you’re scared of losing yourself. Or jeopardizing your career. If you know you want a relationship but you just can’t muster the energy to chase one, it could be fear that’s getting in your way.
  9. Maybe you’re just unknowingly happier being single. The truth is you don’t need a relationship to make you happy. Some people are just happier by themselves than in relationships, and that’s okay. If you’ve explored dating and been in a few relationships and find that you always gravitate towards being on your own, it could be that the single life just feels right for you. You’re allowed to feel like that, even unknowingly, and it doesn’t make you worth any less. The only sad part about choosing the single life is that the other singletons of the world have to miss out on a catch like you!
Vanessa Locampo is an Aussie writer who’s equally obsessed with YA fiction and pasta. Her time is divided between writing all the things, reading all the things, listening to Queen, and bopping her cat on the nose. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing and has written for sites including Hotsprings.co and Discovering Montana, and currently works as an editor at Glam. You can keep up with her on Instagram @vanessaellewrites.