I’m All Or Nothing, So If You Want Halfway, GTFO

Sometimes it feels like you have to sacrifice certain wants and needs to get a guy who’s worth staying with long-term. But I can’t do half-way. Either a guy meets my criteria and he’s all-in on giving our relationship a real shot or I’m moving on. Here’s why I’m an all or nothing girl:

  1. I know what I want. Even though I’m young, I’ve dated enough guys to realize what I want and don’t want out of a relationship. Because of this, I search for certain qualities in a guy that I’m not willing to compromise on because we need to be on the same page. If we don’t have anything in common, what’s the point? I’ve dated enough guys to know that if it’s not meant to be, it’s simply not meant to be.
  2. I refuse to settle. Shouldn’t every girl? It may seem like my standards are too high, but that’s only because I know my worth. There are plenty of guys who live off one-night stands and casual encounters, but for me, that won’t cut it. I need a guy who’s 100% ready build something real. Take it or leave it.
  3. I’m worth it. I’m not the kind of girl who’ll rely on my partner to support me. I want to be as independent as possible because it makes me happy knowing I can take are of myself. If a guy doesn’t see my value, I have no reason to put effort into the relationship. There’s too many fish in the sea.
  4. I can’t afford to waste any time. It’s true. With work, school and a social life, who has extra time to waste on a relationship that’s never going to last? My time is very valuable, and if I can tell right off the bat that a guy is going to end up ditching me, I’m going to cut all ties as soon as possible. It’s nothing personal, I’ve just learned this lesson too many times to let it happen again.
  5. I have to protect myself. Many men may think women aim too high, but that’s only because if we aim too low, we get burned in the end, badly. I’m a sensitive creature who needs safety and stability at all times. If I don’t have that, I lose myself, and that’s just not an option.
  6. I’ve seen what happens when I’m too laid-back. I’ve been with plenty of guys who didn’t genuinely care about me and my well-being. I didn’t demand more so they didn’t offer it and I ended up being screwed over in the end. I want a solid relationship with a guy who knows laziness isn’t going to cut it, end of.
  7. I’ve made enough mistakes. And all I can do is learn from them and make sure they don’t happen again. I stopped settling because I always ended up supremely unhappy and feeling more lonely than I did when I was actually single. I think a lot of girls get taken advantage of because they’re blinded by love. It’s important to always keep my head above the clouds because I never know when someone is going to attempt to blindside me.
  8. Being manipulated happens too often. I hate to say it, but women are manipulated many times because we’re thought to be weak and vulnerable. In reality, we’re a lot stronger than people give us credit for. We get taken advantage of because we want to be nice for people, but many times, that niceness only ends up hurting us more. We need to always be watching out for men who don’t have our best interests at heart.
Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia