I’m Done Waiting For My Other Half—I’m Finally Realizing I’m Already Whole

I spent a good chunk of my life waiting for the right man to come along. I thought that if only I could get that part of my story settled, I’d be happy and free to focus on everything else. Now I understand that it has to happen the other way around—I want to build my best life for myself first:

I won’t wait for a travel companion anymore. I’ve been there, done that, and I don’t want to waste my life away for another second. I started solo traveling about a year ago because I was fed up that no one could or would ever go with me. Once I began, I couldn’t stop. Venturing to new places alone is freaking amazing! I adore my trips and have absolutely no problem rambling around on my own. I honestly love spending time with just myself.

I won’t wait for an adventure buddy either. I’ve always been adventurous and a huge fan of the outdoors. Just as I was with traveling, I was timid about venturing into the mountains or forest on my own for a long time. I wanted someone to share my love of nature. Even if I found that with someone, though, they often couldn’t sate my appetite for adventure. Now I do it myself and I’m much happier.

I don’t need constant company. I’ve always been a bit of a loner. I grew up home schooled with only my younger brother for a friend most of the time. I got very good at entertaining myself, and as a result, I’m never bored now as an adult. While I enjoy the presence of other humans and I’m fairly sociable, I also require a lot of space. This makes it much easier for me to feel whole on my own.

I’m very happy without a partner. I like the idea of being with someone, but I often find the reality inconvenient and disappointing. Men never live up to my expectations and I don’t have the time and energy to devote to maintaining an intense relationship. I’m perfectly content going about my daily life the way it is already. I don’t need a guy to complete my life.

I’m not in need of a best friend—I already have one. In addition to being my own best friend, I’ve lucked out with all the wonderful people in my life. I have a few ladies who’ve stuck by me through the last decade no matter what, and I’ll never do anything to endanger the bond I have with them. I have one bestie in particular I know I can trust with anything. I’m incredibly fortunate.

I have a strong enough relationship with myself to remain independent. I like who I am and I like spending time with myself. I know that I am a strong, trustworthy, hard-working and intelligent person. I know my worth and value and I no longer waste time on other people who don’t. I’m doing just fine on my own and I don’t need anyone to make me feel validated.

I don’t believe in being completed by another person. Do I believe in love? Sure I do. I’m all for it. Do I believe that I need love from a romantic partner to have a fulfilling life? Absolutely not. If I do end up in a relationship, it’ll be as a fully independent human being choosing to spend and share my time with an equal who’s also entirely capable of standing alone.

I refuse to waste my life waiting around for some guy to appear. I used to think that I needed a man to do everything with so that I could truly enjoy it. I never lived in the moment because I was always a little distracted, checking out every guy within 50 feet. I was boy crazy in the most unattractive way. No longer! Now I do exactly what I want when I want and I don’t care if I do it on my own or not.

I won’t put my dreams on hold for some imagined future romance. I don’t know when—or, let’s be real, IF—I’ll ever find the man of my dreams. It doesn’t matter. I’ve become the woman of my dreams. I want to love myself and be proud of who I am above all else. I can’t sit around and hope that love will come around and solve all my problems. I need to solve them here and now.

I know what I want and I’m determined to get it on my own. I don’t need a guy around to achieve all my goals and ambitions. In fact, I’m probably better off without the distraction! When I’m alone, I’m way more focused. I tend to let romance get in the way of the rest of my life. I’m so happy and productive on my own that I almost think I’m meant to fly solo forever.

Love isn’t about needing a partner—it’s about choosing one. Like, I said, if I end up with a guy, it needs to be a very specific type of relationship. I’m my own entity and he has to be one as well. This doesn’t mean we aren’t committed and loyal to each other. It simply means we give each other autonomy and space to be our own individual selves. Some people might not understand, but I don’t care.

I can stand alone, strong and independent no matter what. I went through a lot of crap growing up, but it just made me a tougher person. I’m grateful for all the struggles now because they shaped who I am. I used to feel weak and insecure without someone who loved me and validated that I was worth something, but I’ve taught myself to love who I am. Now I know that I can stand alone as long as it’s necessary because I’m whole on my own.

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