I’m Not The Girl Who Screwed You Over, So Stop Treating Me Like Her

I’m Not The Girl Who Screwed You Over, So Stop Treating Me Like Her ¬©iStock/Pekic

I get it — she screwed you over and now you’re afraid of trusting someone again. I’d like to completely empathize with you, and in a lot of ways I do, but the way you’ve been treating me is not okay. I’m not the woman who betrayed your trust — I’m a completely different person, so I’d appreciate it if you’d stop treating me like her.

  1. I’m not trying to hurt you. It might be hard to believe after the things she did to you, but not everyone is out to hurt you or take advantage of your kindness. I know that your trust in women is slightly shattered, but it’s no excuse to treat me badly. I’m with you because I want to be and I have no hidden agenda, so please stop assuming I’m going to follow in her footsteps. I want happiness just the same as you do.
  2. I’m a completely separate person and I deserve a clean slate. It’s easy to fall into a pattern of fear and relate every small similarity I might have to her as another disaster waiting to happen, but give me a real chance here. I have nothing to do with your past and if you’re ready to let this go, I’d like to be part of your future.
  3. If you’re not ready for this, let me know. If you’re not ready to go down this road with me — or anyone, for that matter — you need to tell me straight up. I’m not going to stick around and act as your emotional punching bag if your true bottom line is that you’re not healed enough to date someone at all. I’ll be sad to see you go, but I’ll be damned if I pay for another woman’s mistakes.
  4. Not all women are crazy, so stop assuming I am. Just because another woman messed with your head and betrayed your kindness and trust doesn’t mean that all women are the same. Only one woman screwed you around and the rest of us don’t deserve to be punished for the sour taste you have in your mouth.
  5. I haven’t given yo any reason to doubt me, so you should show me more respect. There’s literally no rhyme or reason for you to treat me like I’m a ticking time bomb waiting to explode more agony into your life. I deserve a lot more credit. Take a good look at me and realize that I’m someone new and I deserve to be given the fresh start to show you how good things could be.
  6. I’m willing to be patient if you’re willing to admit you’re in pain. The truth is, I know I should walk away, but I’m also human and I understand that your past has left you scars that serve more as open wounds. The thing is, if you keep picking at your scabs, they’ll never fully heal, so you need to show me some trust and admit you’re still hurting. I can’t guarantee this thing with us is going to work out, but I can say that if you don’t explain your behavior and seek to improve it, you’ll end up behind me as just another a-hole who couldn’t man up to his chance with me.
  7. If you want things to work, you need to take a leap of faith. Sooner or later, you need to take the gamble, march forward with your life and leave your crappy past behind you where it belongs. If you want to make a future happen with me, you need to let go of the past — there’s no other way.
  8. It’s human to be afraid, but I’m not her. I understand your hesitation, but I won’t put up with being treated like someone I’m not. Like I said, if you’re not ready to move on with your life, you shouldn’t be dating anyone at all. If you want to keep me in the picture, you need to treat me like who I am instead of who you’re afraid I could be. I’m not the girl who screwed you over, and I won’t let you treat me like her.