I’m Not The “Hot Girl” & I’m OK With That

I’m Not The “Hot Girl” & I’m OK With That ©iStock/Rohappy

I’ve never been the hot girl. Growing up I was deemed cute, pretty, funny and full of personality by people who knew me, but I was never sexy or desirable. It may sound like I’m ragging on myself, but I’m not. Not only am I OK with not being the hot girl, I actually prefer it.

  1. I know I have more to offer than just looks. Being exceptionally beautiful is seen as something to strive for these days. It’s no longer an additional perk, it’s the whole package. When someone loves me, I know it’s because of a lot more than just my looks, and that means I can feel good about my relationships.
  2. Beauty fades. Sure, all those hot girls on Instagram appear to have it all, but we all have our own problems. Plus, a few years from now they’re going to start getting wrinkles and sagging skin just like the rest of us. We’re all human.
  3. I’m a good person, and that’s what matters. I may not be your typical 10 on the hotness scale, but as an all around person, I score well above that. If a thigh gap, big boobs and an apple bottom is all a woman has to offer, I feel much worse for her than I do myself.
  4. I’d rather be smart. A lot of guys will put up with dumb girls just because they’re hot, but at the end of the day, they’ll tire of her just like any other girl they don’t have a connection to. Hot girls can of course be brilliant, but if I had to choose between being Halle Berry hot or knowing the difference between their and they’re, I’d choose the latter.
  5. Beauty is subjective. There are girls that most everyone will find attractive, and then there are girls that will be beautiful in the eyes of those that matter most to them. When the right guy sees me, he’ll see a knockout even if the world doesn’t.
  6. I’m not going to kill myself trying to look perfect. Perfection doesn’t exist, and it took me a long time to figure that out. Of course I could spend tons of money on makeup and personal trainers and eat less than a chipmunk, but in the end, it’s not going to matter. I’ll do what it takes to be healthy and that’ll be good enough for me.
  7. Vanity doesn’t matter that much to me. Personality is what ultimately makes a person, and I like to think that I’m able to look past the cover and into the pages of an individual’s book. When it comes to the people I want in my life, I’d like them to have that same quality.
  8. I don’t have the time or energy to care what other people think. It took me a long time to accept me as I am, and I sure as hell don’t have that kind of time to devote to getting others to accept me. My opinion, and the opinions of those I love, are the ones that matter most — and I’m downright happy with the way they, and I, feel about myself.
  9. I want to be loved for the right reasons. When someone loves me, I know for a fact it’s not because I’m arm candy. Some (not all) hot women may be perfectly fine with being an accessory, and that’s their prerogative, but I would feel terrible about myself if some people thought that’s all I was good for.
  10. I may not be typically hot, but I’m uniquely beautiful. I’m the only one that looks like me. I haven’t copied any celebrities hair nor do I buy into beauty trends like Kylie lips and brows or the big butt craze. Sure, I’m not as hot as those girls, but I have my own unique look to offer, and that’s fine by me.
  11. I don’t need to be compared to anyone. I am uniquely me, and being compared to anyone just doesn’t fly with me. “Hot” girls don’t live easier lives and I’m not necessarily a better person just because I don’t look as good. We all fight different battles, and comparing ourselves to one another won’t fix any of them.
Angelica Bottaro has a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Trent University and an Advanced Diploma in Journalism from Centennial College. She began her career as a freelance writer in 2014, racking up bylines in The Good Men Project, MakeWell, LymeTime, YouQueen, and more. She eventually shifted her focus and began writing about mental health, nutrition, and chronic disease for VeryWell Health.

You can follow her on Facebook or check out her website at AngelicaBottaro.ca. She also posts on Instagram @a.ct._b and Twitter @angiiebee.
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