I’m An Open Book On The First Date & It Gets Me Into Trouble

There are so many so-called rules for first dates. Don’t mention your ex. Don’t say you want to fall in love and get married and all that. Don’t show the person sitting across from you drinking a beer that yeah, you’re super neurotic. While these rules are pretty logical, they can mess with your head and make dating seem way more serious than it needs to be. The thing is, I’m an open book on a first date and it gets me into trouble, but I wouldn’t have it any other way:

  1. I show my crazy. Okay, I’m not in crazy ex-girlfriend territory or even all that nuts of a person, but I am a workaholic who’s constantly thinking about how to work more efficiently, be more productive and enjoy life more. I always talk about how much I love and live to work on a first date. Sometimes guys get it, sometimes they don’t. Mostly they don’t (at least not so far), but I’m never sorry.
  2. I ramble. I don’t know you and you don’t know me, but I’m going to keep talking… and talking. I can’t help it. My first date nerves take over and soon I’m talking about my eternal love of LOST or coffee addiction and there’s no stopping me. Hopefully it’s cute. But usually guys stare at me like I’ve got two heads or something. Oh well, just trying to break the super awkward silence.
  3. I mention bad dates. I get that this is against The Dating Laws but it happens. If we met via Tinder, you’re going to hear what a jerk said to me once or about the guy who greeted me with, “Whoa, you’re short.” This doesn’t always go over super well, but it’s better than showing zero personality and self-respect, right?
  4. I say I had fun. For some reason, this really freaks certain people out. If it’s a good-to-mediocre date, I’ll tell you that it was fun and see what your response is. Why hide how I feel? You’re just going to ghost me  if you hated me. I’m only half kidding.
  5. I’ll tell you when you’re being a jerk. Luckily I’ve only had to do this once, but it might happen again. I can stand up for myself like any other strong, independent woman and that makes me a catch in my books. The look on the guy’s face was pretty priceless. Needless to say, there was no second date.
  6. I complain about my friends’ dating lives. Yeah, I go there. It’s always accidental but I’m a chatty person. If it’s relevant, sometimes I talk about a friend’s jerk boyfriend or laugh about a bad date I can’t believe my BFF went on. Most guys don’t appreciate this. Oops.
  7. I’m honest to a fault. Ask me a question and I’ll answer it. I’ll also probably give you my opinion, even if it’s not something that you actually want to hear. This may not make for the best first dates on the planet, but I’m hopeful that someday, the right guy will love my kind of crazy and be into it.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.