Indecision is a decision — If He’s Not Saying Yes, He’s Saying No

Indecision is a decision — If He’s Not Saying Yes, He’s Saying No ©iStock/Juan Monino

You want a serious relationship and you’ve never been shy about saying so. Things are going well with him, but for some reason, he’s still waffling on whether or not he wants to commit. Screw
that — his indecision is a decision, and you’re better than waiting around to see if it’ll all work out.

  1. Your time is as valuable as his. Making you wait for him as he tries to “figure things out” is okay if he’s got a legit reason for his reservations. However, for the most part, this indecision is just a sign that he’s selfish, immature and not worth your time. If that’s the case, you really have no option but to do the right thing: put yourself and your happiness first.
  2. He’s an immature boy, not a grown manA real man wouldn’t keep you guessing about how he feels about you and where your relationship is going. If you constantly find yourself wondering what he really thinks and feels because he’s so wishy-washy, save yourself the brain power. That’s high school stuff, and you’re well past that. You don’t want to spend the rest of your life playing his mind games, do you?
  3. He’s supposed to choose you no matter what. If he can’t decide that he wants a future with you when you’ve been together for a while, then he obviously don’t want what you have — at least not long-term. Don’t waste your precious time waiting for him to reach the point of being sure about you and your relationship because it might never come. Besides, if he was worth it, choosing you would be a no-brainer.
  4. He only wants you for the sexBy now, he should have figured out that you’re not the type of girl he can call anytime he needs help with getting off. You’re someone his heart should be devoted to, not just his penis. So if it’s obvious that he see you the way he’s supposed to, leave.
  5. He’s keeping his options open. He doesn’t want to let you go until he’s sure he has someone to replace you. What other reason would he have for keeping you waiting? Unless you want to win the Biggest Fool of the Year award, you shouldn’t be sticking around to find out if he’ll wake up one day realizing he’s finally ready to commit.
  6. He’s not as invested in the relationship as you are. You’ve probably given him your mind, body, soul, everything — but what about him? Does he give you what you rightfully deserve? Does he go the extra mile to make you a happy and satisfied girlfriend? If not, you’d be better off finding someone who recognizes your value and treats you like you matter.
  7. You deserve more — and better. You’ve stuck with him despite his issues. That’s good enough for the world to see that you definitely deserve better: a guy who’s got balls, who may not be able to give you the sun and moon but would at least attempt to make you the happiest woman on earth. Dump Mr. Maybe and find Mr. Yes.
Maine Belonio is a twenty-something mom and writer who has a penchant for coffee, long distance running, Tolkien, Switchfoot, and Jesus. Find her broken, honest, and brave musings at