Is My Relationship Toxic? 10 Signs You’re Part Of An Unhealthy Partnership

Love can make us blissfully unaware of a lot of things, including the negative aspects of our relationship. The partnership might not be the best thing for you and it may be holding you back from true happiness, only you’re too blinded by your emotions to see it. Here are the signs that you’re in an unhealthy relationship and need to get out ASAP.

  1. You don’t have a life outside of your relationship anymore. Since you entered this relationship, have you found yourself seeing fewer people and doing fewer things? Before you met your partner, would you often spend time with your friends? Did you have hobbies that brought you joy? Often in toxic relationships, the controlling partner wants every last minute of your time and doesn’t want you to see anyone else. If your life now consists of going to work and going home with nothing that makes you happy in between, it may be a sign that your relationship isn’t the healthiest.
  2. They play head games with you. If your partner is constantly picking fights with you over tiny things, trying to stir up drama or just playing games with you in general, this is a completely toxic and immature behavior. A person who truly loves you will never want to frustrate or confuse you. They will want to make you feel at ease and always happy in your relationship with them.
  3. They are easily set off. Do you find yourself constantly walking on eggshells, afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing that may make your partner mad? If you’re in a relationship with someone who is very easily upset and seems to take tiny things personally or get angry over the slightest hiccups, you may be in a toxic relationship. The right person for you won’t make you feel like everything has to be perfect. They will make you feel at ease.
  4. You feel the need to be perfect more than ever. If you’ve felt the need to constantly try to improve yourself or keep yourself seemingly perfect, your partner might be intimidating to you, which is a toxic behavior. Toxic partners often expect the people they’re with to look and act perfect at all times. The right person for you will never make you feel like you have to be a certain way. They will love you for who you are, flaws and all.
  5. They use guilt and fear to control you. A toxic partner will constantly try to make you feel guilty or even scared of them in order to control your every move. If the person you’re with tries to make you feel like you have something to be sorry for when you do simple things like making plans with friends and family or going somewhere without them, they’re absolutely toxic and you need to reevaluate that relationship immediately. No good can come from someone who wants to take away your free will.
  6. The attempt to isolate you. If your partner tries to pull you away from everyone else in your life, including your friends, family, and coworkers, it’s a sure sign that they’re toxic. Toxic partners like to be in control and if they can completely take you away from everyone else who cares for you in your life, you will eventually be completely dependent on them and that will make it harder for you to leave them.
  7. Your friends and family have voiced their concerns. Often when we’re in a relationship that isn’t healthy, we may not realize it, but the people in our lives that care about us most definitely will. If your close friends and family have approached you about the person you’re with, voicing their concerns and questioning this person’s love for you, listen to them even if if it might be difficult. The very least you can do is hear them out and consider the possibility of what they’re saying. True, it can be hard to see things clearly when you’re in love or have strong emotions for someone. However, the people that love you have no reason to lie to you, so keep what they say in mind.
  8. They treat you like an object to show off. If your partner loves to take you out for the mere purpose of showing you off to their friends and coworkers and treating you as if you’re some kind of trophy, not only is this completely degrading and infuriating, it’s also toxic. They will likely place very high expectations on you of how you are supposed to look and act, completely disregarding the fact that you have an opinion and choice too. This behavior is unacceptable and should not be tolerated.
  9. You feel trapped in the relationship. If the isolation and intimidation that your partner has placed onto you have made you feel like you couldn’t leave the relationship even if you wanted to, this is toxic behavior at its finest. You should never feel trapped in any relationship with anyone, no matter how long you’ve been with them or how serious your relationship has become. The moment when you feel like the relationship is an obligation and not your choice anymore, it’s absolutely time to leave.
  10. You can’t remember who you were before. A toxic relationship will suck the life out of you and make you forget the happy, vibrant person you were before. You have so many amazing qualities and great things to offer to the world and a toxic partner will want to mute all of that because they don’t want you to have confidence and independence. If you’re so deep into this relationship that you forget about all of the dreams and goals you had for yourself before, this relationship is not for you. You should never have to silence who you are to make someone else happy.


Shelby is a journalist and fiction writer raised in the South but built for the big city. She's a book nerd (well, an overall nerd, honestly) and coffee addict and obsessed with all things leather and lacy.

She has a bachelor’s degree in Mass Communication and Media Studies from Sam Houston State University and worked for her university newspaper, The Houstonian, as well as serving as a producer and part-time entertainment anchor for Cable 7 Huntsville. You can follow her on Twitter @shelby777.