There are many answers to this question, and it varies from person to person. Some people will say that all their friends’ partners met through Tinder, others will say that they barely use it for bagging a quick lay and that there are too many negatives. Here’s a rundown on whether online dating is worth it or not. The short answer? It totally is.
- You can meet people in your area. People who you otherwise wouldn’t even know existed. It’s an easy way of feeling like you’re efficiently engaging in the “opportunities” that are most available to you. Yes, some people swear by long-term relationships, but there’s something to be said for the security of having certainty that there will be people in your area that are down to get down. Picking up what I’m putting down?
- You consider people you wouldn’t consider otherwise. Most people you meet on Tinder you would probably pass in a club within a 10-minute period. It ensures that you do your due diligence and covers all the bases. Leave no rock unturned. Online dating is worth it in this respect because you can unlearn some of your own standards. Yes, you might think you love people who are tall, dark, and handsome and who are bad boys, but if you have a minute to swipe on a skinny ginger guy after a glass of wine, then what’s wrong with that? Give people a chance.
- You can be vain. In private. You don’t have to tell your friends your inner monologue when you pass on a guy or engage with him, as you do when you’re in person. It’s a way to pass the time when you’re bored, but you can also sit down and meaningfully assess who you want to be with. There’s something really empowering about getting to assert that sort of agency in your own life. This is not an opportunity that will fall into your lap, but one that you can define and advocate for.
- Of course, you might miss out on spontaneous opportunities. What about the other side of that coin? You might think that if you’re always at home swiping under your duvet rather than being out on the front line that you miss out on those opportunities. This is valid. Yes, you see people you might otherwise miss out on, but it also means that you don’t have access to the people who might come in from out of town in a pub. Oh wait – dating apps actually do that too. Don’t worry, even with online dating, you can still make room for excitement. It’s how the relationship starts, not the whole relationship.
- You troubleshoot compatibility. This is a good time-saver. You can make sure that you are at least a base level of compatibility. You will have seen his profile and found him funny or compelling enough to pursue. He will have done the same. You can ensure that you see him from a few curated angles and a few starting points for date ideas based on what’s in the profile.
- You know they like you. This is also a fast way of streamlining the process of dating. In Youperson, you have to judge their body language and make eye contact from across the bar. It’s a whole game of cat and mouse. Online, there’s no such ambiguity. You only meet the two people that swipe on each other. It’s simple. Maybe not the most romantic situation, but hey – it’s a good confidence booster. That calms you down in the opening stages.
- You can keep your options open. You will be swiping on multiple people and talking to them all on the same platform. It’s a great way of making sure that you stay well-rounded and don’t over-commit. You will also find that you can get better and better at online dating — and dating in general — with practice. If anything, you will literally be able to see a material metric where you can compare previous talking stages. For better or for worse – that’s what you didn’t know about Tinder. It’s always great to be reminded that you have other options and that you’re a catch. It keeps the people treating you badly on their toes. You won’t stick around when other people will treat you better. If he’s not responding to you, he has no excuse.
- You can make it a passive part of your life. Online dating is totally worth it for those of us who are a bit more introverted or who simply aren’t one for the social scene. When dating in person, you really do have to “put yourself out there” by going to bars, clubs, parties, and other places single people might be hanging out. With dating apps, you can swipe until you find someone who catches your eye and if they feel the same, then you can think about leaving the house.
- You can present the best side of yourself. I’m not at all suggesting that you catfish anyone by posting pictures that are so heavily Photoshopped that you’re unrecognizable in it, but creating an online dating profile does give you an opportunity to present all of the best parts of you, physically and otherwise, in one page. First impressions are everything, and this is a major bonus of dating apps.
- You know that they’re doing that too. This is also reassuring. You know that you aren’t – either of you – under any illusions of what the relationship will be. That takes the pressure off and lets you both be the best version of each other. You will stop wasting time playing games and just get down to business. Whatever that means for you, that is.
