We’ve all been through at least one breakup that’s totally blindsided us. Few things can feel more devastating than the loss of what you thought was a good relationship, and it’s easy to get totally lost in the anger and heartbreak. If this sounds all too familiar, here are a few ways to pull yourself out of your bad breakup rut:
Hang out with girlfriends.
I know the last thing you want to do is brush your hair and leave the tub of ice cream behind, but your friends are truly the best therapy. Not only will they understand, they’ll remind you of just how awesome you are, and why there are so many better things ahead. They’ll cry with you, party with you, drink wine with you, laugh with you, and probably hate on your ex more than even you do.
Get out of town for a little while.
Sometimes the best thing you could do for yourself is to have a change of scenery. Even if you can’t do a long or expensive trip somewhere exotic, just a road trip for the day or weekend does wonders for a cluttered mind. Whether you go alone or with a friend, get in your car, blast some awesome music, roll your windows down, and bask in the utter freedom of it all.
Go to the gym.
They don’t call it a revenge body for nothing! Dust off the gym membership that’s been shelved for the past year, and put it to good use. The endorphins released from working out will help fight off the post breakup sadness. Plus, you’ll be looking fantastic in no time. Besides, as much as working out is a drag at times, it will give you something to really focus on and be proud of in the end.
Cut off all contact with him.
You’ll never be able to move on with your life if you’re sending drunk texts every weekend, or creeping his Instagram account like it’s your full-time job. As much as it might hurt to think about not talking to him anymore, you will be in pain over and over again if you do. Also, save yourself the embarrassment of accidentally liking one of his pictures and delete him. You will thank yourself one day.
Create new goals and future plans that are all about you.
Now is the time to really think about who you are, what you want to do in life, and how to form the goals to get you there. Maybe it’s time to focus on a new career path or going back to school. Even something simple like starting a savings account for that big trip you’ve always wanted to go on will give you something to really look forward to. This is the time to step out of your comfort zone and actually see what’s out there waiting for you to come find it.
Learn to truly love yourself, and then do it.
No matter how bad you’re feeling in the moment, never be too hard on yourself. It’s OK to look at the areas you know you can improve upon, but remember all of your good qualities too. Discover new parts of yourself to love, and embrace the existing ones as well. After all, you’re only human, and while you might not be perfect, you’re still pretty great.